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Tag: church jokes

Daily Quick Break: March 31, 2008: Funny Church Bulletins and Announcement Mistakes and Bloopers

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Don’t let worries kill you- let the church help.

Here are some really funny church bulletins and announcements:

Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals. The sermon this morning: “Jesus Walks on the Water.” The sermon tonight: “Searching for Jesus.”

Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.

To read the rest, go to: Funny Church Bulletins and Announcement Mistakes and Bloopers

Daily Quick Break: March 7, 2008: Funny Bulletin and Church Service Announcement

Every day InnocentEnglish.com posts a new funny or cool Quick Break. The Quick Break section has today’s quick break plus previous ones so you can browse through any you missed.

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More real mistakes and mistatements from Church Sunday service bulletins and announcements.Some of these are mildly amusing, some are really funny, and some approach hilarious.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is Hell?” Come early and listen to our
choir practice.

Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.

The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility. Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.

The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind.

To read the rest, go to: Funny Bulletin and Church Service Announcement

Daily Quick Break: February 21, 2008: Religion

Every day InnocentEnglish.com posts a new funny or cool Quick Break. The Quick Break section has today’s quick break plus previous ones so you can browse through any you missed.

These funny bloopers are actual mistakes by students I have tutored in Conversational English, and are from my humor book.

Do you believe in Cod?

Christians believe if they do not sin they will have salivation.

We must try to control our animal orgies.

What means “you should never stone the first cast”?

Which religion do you use?

Our church has smaller members every week.

To read the rest, go to: Religion

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