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–Do you like cops? –Only when they are not behind my rear-view mirror. 1/_You locked yourself in, asshole! 2/_Yeah, just you and me, asshole! 2. First Johnny Squares, Then Molly Fisher, Now Nolan Kennard. Like I said Harry, Celebrities, they always die… 1. In threes, yeah. 2. Yeah, but at least he went out with.. … Read more

1 Raisins? 2 Yuck. 3 Wait a minute, who gave us half a roll? 4 (talking with his mouth full) I’m eating the other half. 3 Come on. 4 You want me to put it back? I mean, if I was ever going to buy a desk set… twice! I would probably buy this one, … Read more

(1) I’m not here for your amusement Matthew. I’m here for a little respect. (2) Why, coz you’re a nun and you have a cross in your neck? (1) No, because I’m a person and a person deserves respect. (1) You’re a sister? (2) Yes. (1) You’re not from MTV? (2) No. (1) Are you … Read more