<< Top 10 Funniest Bushisms of All Time  |  

Funny Bulletin and Church Service Announcement

More real mistakes and mistatements from Church Sunday service bulletins and announcements.Some of these are mildly amusing, some are really funny, and some approach hilarious.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is Hell?” Come early and listen to our
choir practice.

Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.

The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility. Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.

The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.

The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next week.

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: “I Upped My Pledge. – Up Yours.”



Page Topic: Funny Bulletin and Church Service Announcement



<< Top 10 Funniest Bushisms of All Time  |  


7 Responses to “Funny Bulletin and Church Service Announcement””

  1. Kay Cude Says:
    January 30th, 2008 at 12:41 pm

    These are great! Some of the best humor is from church bulletins prepared by God-loving and fearing people. We love our Lord, but we just can’t type. Not only that, we are overly familiar with dangling participles!

  2. EvgenBlya Says:
    June 27th, 2008 at 9:24 am

    What’s your favorite place to download movies? Feel free to share your secret places ;)

    Places what I already know:
    1. eDonkey2000 network. Disadvantage of this way is that neccesery to download eD2k client. By the way eMule is the best eD2k client I know. Hard to find movie you exectly need. To many fake files in this network. And download speed sometimes very slow. But really HUGE number of movies available. Absolutely free.

    2. Torrent trackers. Well known and the biggest trackers like Demonoid and The Pirate Bay contains lot’s of files, but as in eD2k sometimes takes to much time to find what you need, not fake and in good quality. Absolutely free.

    3. File sharing servers like RapidShare. Lot’s of sites post links to file sharing servers with movies. But because of file size limit 100mb movies divided in 10-15 parts, and it’s really annoying to download them without premium account. And premium account cost money.

    4. Special movie downloads sites. Movie downloads sites like Movie Downloads Library provide high quality movies in any format you need. If you need a video for your iPod and you download full 1,4Gb movie from torrent tracker, you need to do it yourself, download special software and convert file. It’s really nice to download movies like , to iPod and watch them on the way to work/study. But you need to pay for this pleasure ;) Not much, but still …

    5. Other. Please feel free to write your places where you download movies. Maybe I still don’t know some interesting places.

  3. Orelebate Says:
    January 21st, 2009 at 6:23 pm

    Nothing seems to be easier than seeing someone whom you can help but not helping.
    I suggest we start giving it a try. Give love to the ones that need it.
    God will appreciate it.

  4. Advicledife Says:
    February 26th, 2009 at 4:31 am

    u00d0u009fu00d1u0080u00d0u00beu00d0u00b4u00d0u00b0u00d1u008eu00d1u0082u00d1u0081u00d1u008f u00d0u00b7u00d0u00b5u00d0u00bcu00d0u00b5u00d0u00bbu00d1u008cu00d0u00bdu00d1u008bu00d0u00b5 u00d1u0083u00d1u0087u00d0u00b0u00d1u0081u00d1u0082u00d0u00bau00d0u00b8 u00d0u00beu00d1u0082 u00d1u0081u00d0u00beu00d0u00b1u00d1u0081u00d1u0082u00d0u00b2u00d0u00b5u00d0u00bdu00d0u00bdu00d0u00b8u00d0u00bau00d0u00b0
    20-25 u00d1u0081u00d0u00beu00d1u0082u00d0u00beu00d0u00ba, u00d0u00beu00d1u0082 100.000 u00d1u0080u00d1u0083u00d0u00b1 u00d0u00b7u00d0u00b0 u00d1u0081u00d0u00beu00d1u0082u00d0u00bau00d1u0083
    u00d0u009du00d0u00b0u00d0u00b7u00d0u00bdu00d0u00b0u00d1u0087u00d0u00b5u00d0u00bdu00d0u00b8u00d0u00b5 – u00d0u0098u00d0u0096u00d0u00a1, u00d0u00b1u00d0u00b5u00d0u00b7 u00d0u00bfu00d0u00beu00d0u00b4u00d1u0080u00d1u008fu00d0u00b4u00d0u00b0
    70 u00d0u00bau00d0u00bc u00d0u00beu00d1u0082 u00d0u009cu00d0u009au00d0u0090u00d0u0094, u00d0u00a7u00d0u00b5u00d1u0085u00d0u00beu00d0u00b2u00d1u0081u00d0u00bau00d0u00b8u00d0u00b9 u00d1u0080u00d0u00b0u00d0u00b9u00d0u00beu00d0u00bd (u00d0u00a1u00d0u00b8u00d0u00bcu00d1u0084u00d0u00b5u00d1u0080u00d0u00beu00d0u00bfu00d0u00beu00d0u00bbu00d1u008cu00d1u0081u00d0u00bau00d0u00beu00d0u00b5 u00d1u0088.), u00d1u0080.u00d0u009bu00d0u00beu00d0u00bfu00d0u00b0u00d1u0081u00d0u00bdu00d1u008f
    u00d0u0097u00d0u00b0u00d0u00bau00d0u00b0u00d0u00b7u00d0u00b0u00d1u0082u00d1u008c u00d0u00bfu00d0u00beu00d0u00bau00d0u00b0u00d0u00b7 u00d1u0083u00d1u0087u00d0u00b0u00d1u0081u00d1u0082u00d0u00bau00d0u00b0 u00d0u00bcu00d0u00beu00d0u00b6u00d0u00bdu00d0u00be u00d0u00bfu00d0u00be u00d1u0082u00d0u00b5u00d0u00bbu00d0u00b5u00d1u0084u00d0u00beu00d0u00bdu00d1u0083 (495) 967-5678

  5. u00d0u00adu00d1u0080u00d0u00b8u00d0u00ba Says:
    May 30th, 2009 at 10:17 am

    u00d0u009du00d0u00b0 u00d0u0092u00d0u00b0u00d1u0088 u00d1u0081u00d0u00b0u00d0u00b9u00d1u0082 u00d0u00b7u00d0u00bdu00d0u00b0u00d0u00bau00d0u00beu00d0u00bcu00d1u008bu00d0u00b9 u00d0u00b2 u00d0u00b0u00d1u0081u00d1u008cu00d0u00bau00d1u0083 u00d1u0081u00d1u0081u00d1u008bu00d0u00bbu00d0u00bau00d1u0083 u00d0u00bau00d0u00b8u00d0u00bdu00d1u0083u00d0u00bb. u00d0u009eu00d0u00bau00d0u00b0u00d0u00b7u00d0u00b0u00d0u00bbu00d0u00beu00d1u0081u00d1u008c ,u00d1u0087u00d1u0082u00d0u00be u00d0u00bdu00d0u00b5 u00d0u00b7u00d1u0080u00d1u008f :) u00d0u009fu00d0u00beu00d0u00bdu00d1u0080u00d0u00b0u00d0u00b2u00d0u00b8u00d0u00bbu00d0u00beu00d1u0081u00d1u008c. u00d0u00a2u00d0u00b5u00d0u00bfu00d1u0080u00d1u008c u00d0u00b2u00d1u0081u00d0u00b5 u00d0u00b2u00d1u0080u00d0u00b5u00d0u00bcu00d1u008f u00d1u0087u00d0u00b8u00d1u0082u00d0u00b0u00d1u0082u00d1u008c u00d0u00b1u00d1u0083u00d0u00b4u00d1u0083 :)

  6. u00d0u0092u00d0u00b0u00d1u0081u00d0u00b8u00d0u00bbu00d0u00b8u00d0u00b9 u00d0u009fu00d0u00b5u00d1u0082u00d1u0080u00d0u00beu00d0u00b2 Says:
    June 21st, 2009 at 2:37 am

    u00d0u009au00d1u0080u00d1u0083u00d1u0082u00d0u00b0u00d1u008f u00d1u0081u00d1u0082u00d0u00b0u00d1u0082u00d1u008cu00d1u008f, u00d0u00bcu00d0u00bdu00d0u00b5 u00d0u00bau00d0u00b0u00d0u00b6u00d0u00b5u00d1u0082u00d1u0081u00d1u008f u00d1u0087u00d1u0082u00d0u00be u00d0u00b2u00d0u00b0u00d0u00bc u00d0u00bdu00d1u0083u00d0u00b6u00d0u00bdu00d0u00be u00d0u00b2 u00d0u00bau00d0u00b0u00d0u00bau00d0u00b8u00d0u00b5 u00d0u00bdu00d0u00b8u00d0u00b1u00d1u0083u00d0u00b4u00d1u008c u00d0u00b6u00d1u0083u00d1u0080u00d0u00bdu00d0u00b0u00d0u00bbu00d1u008b u00d1u0081u00d0u00bfu00d0u00b5u00d1u0086u00d0u00b8u00d0u00b0u00d0u00bbu00d1u008cu00d0u00bdu00d1u008bu00d0u00b5 u00d0u00bfu00d0u00b8u00d1u0081u00d0u00b0u00d1u0082u00d1u008c :)

  7. Projekty Domów Says:
    December 29th, 2010 at 10:47 pm

    Your joking, right?

COMMENT (Not all comments are approved, including rude comments and those with strong language).

Section: Funny English Bloopers & Mistakes

<< Top 10 Funniest Bushisms of All Time  |  

Click for privacy policy

All content is © InnocentEnglish.com: Funny Jokes, Signs, Pics, Bloopers, English mistakes and More, 2005-2011, or is in the public domain, or is © by the respective copyright holders. Please contact for prompt removal of any inadvertent © content, with apologies.