Funny Pickup Lines Comebacks
Funny comebacks to stupid, dumb and funny pickup lines.
Here’s some funny responses to have in mind, just in case some guy tries any “clever”, funny or dumb pick up lines on you.
Top pick up line comebacks:
Man: “Haven’t we met before?”
Woman: “Maybe. I’m the receptionist at the VD Clinic.”
Man: “Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
Woman: “Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.”
Man: “Is this seat empty?”
Woman: “Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.”
Man: “So, wanna go back to my place ?”
Woman: “Well, I don’t know. Will two people fit under a rock?”
Man: “Your place or mine?”
Woman: “Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine.”
Man: “I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
Woman: “It’s in the phone book.”
Man: “But I don’t know your name.”
Woman: “That’s in the phone book too.”
Man: “So what do you do for a living?”
Woman: “I’m a female impersonator.”
Man: “Hey, baby, what’s your sign?”
Woman: “Do not Enter”
Man: “How do you like your eggs in the morning?”
Woman: “Unfertilized !”
Man: “Hey, come on, we’re both here at this bar for the same reason”
Woman: “Yeah! Let’s pick up some chicks!”
Man: “I know how to please a woman.”
Woman: “Then please leave me alone.”
Man: “I want to give myself to you.”
Woman: “Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.”
Man: “If I could see you naked, I’d die happy:
Woman: “Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing”.
Man: “Your body is like a temple.”
Woman: “Sorry, there are no services today.”
Man: “I’d go through anything for you.”
Woman: “Good! Let’s start with your bank account. Then the door.”
Man: “I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: “Yes, but would you stay there?
It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m checking you out.
Oh, sorry, I’m reserved for someone else.
This may be the all time most memorable response to a pick up line. From Erin Brockovich, starring Julia Roberts. Remember this scene?
George: Can I get your number?
Erin Brockovich: My number? Which one do you want?
George: How many numbers you got?
Erin Brockovich: Oh, I got numbers comin’ outta my ears. For instance: ten.
George: Ten?
Erin Brockovich: Yeah. That’s how many months old my baby girl is.
George: You got a little girl?
Erin Brockovich: Yeah. Yeah, sexy, huh? How ’bout this for a number? Six. That’s how old my other daughter is, eight is the age of my son, two is how many times I’ve been married – and divorced; sixteen is the number of dollars I have in my bank account. 850-3943. That’s my phone number, and with all the numbers I gave you, I’m guessing zero is the number of times you’re gonna call it!
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Page Topic: Funny Pickup Lines Comebacks
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Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put “u” and “i” together.
Girl: Really? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put “f” and “u” together.
heres another one
Boy “what are you looking at?”
Girl “not much really!”
Man: You are so beautiful
Woman: I know… You can leave now.
guy: you wanna dance
girl:no
guy:hey i was wondering why you wear a bra since you have nothin 2 fill it
girl:well you wear pants, dont you?
Boy: Why dont you come over to my place?
Girl: Sorry im allergic to monkeys.
Boy: What do you mean?
Girl: I cant go to the zoo.
I think these are sexest against guys but the have every right to be cause a lot of guys are pigs I’m a pig but still
Guy: Are you from Tennessee? ‘Cause you’re the only ten I see!
Girl: No, i’m from Arizona, so get out of my zone-a.
These jokes are okay…..needs some more creativity
these comebacks are funny ilike them
u so ugly they used your face for halloween
u so dumb u eat red crayons cause you think they taste like cherry
your teeth so yellow they look like you eat yellow crayons
i liked them they are awesome
so these are the best you got? oh well, another disappointment in life
*you don’t wash your hands in the bathroom*
Person: Didn’t your mother teach you to wash your hands after you pee?
You: She also taught me not to get pee on them.
i think your jokes are ok some are from other sites and you need to think of more funny and interesting jokes and sesible ones for kids to read NO dirty ones!
Wow i lovvvvvvvvvvvveeeeee thessssseee. I used one of these to meet my now husband. i cannot thank you all enough. now i get pleased everynight
:(
hi
BOY:if i could rearrange the alphabet i would put u and i together.
GIRL:thats ok i like the alphabet the way it is with n and o put together.
these jokes are soooooooo funny, if people dont like them they dont have to read all of them just get off the freakin website huh now how bout that???????
these are hilarious if people dont like them dont waste your time commenting just get off the freakin website
heres onee
mAN: Where have u’ve been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you
Guy: There’s something wrong with my phone.
Girl: What?
Guy: Your number’s not in it.
yo momas so fat, she has to iron her pants on the driveway
I like the one about the “Never going back to the place where we sorta met”!!! lol
roses are red, violets are blue, god made me pretty, wat the hell happened 2 you ?!
i have nothing 2 say besides no way in a million years would i use any of these sorry but its true they may be funny….
HAHA NOT!
loved the one about the guy askN the girl to dance and she says no….guys says im sorry you must have misunderstD me..i SIAD..you look fat in them paints….ahhahahhahaahahahahah
ok i’ve seen these a thousand times. how about this one:
guy: how about me and you go in the bathroom and have some fun? ;)
girl: hmmm you know what? sure, i guess i can spare two minutes.
Yeahhh…. ummm… if i used these i think i’d just look idiotic.
laammee.
The comments are funnier.
Boy: Can i borrow a pen?
Girl: sure
*gives him a pen*
Boy: This pen doesnt work
Girl: Yeah it does
Boy: No it doesnt. Go ahead and try it. *takes out a piece of paper* Now just write you number right there.
these a hilarios
THE KNY ONE THAT WAS FUNNY WAS THEE ONEE ABOT THE FERTILIZED EGGS
!
BUT THERE CHEESY LOL !
ur jokes are bad, get better ones or
I love dancers…may I love u?
guy:can i have your number?
girl: yea here.
*guy takes his phone out*
1800 – g e t – l o s t
guy: did it hurt?
girl: what?
guy: when u fell from heaven?
girl: no. i hurts me to talk to you tho.