Funny English From Around The World
Funny English Bloopers Too Close To Home
« Previous Page: Really Funny Bad Starting Paragraphs of Novels | Next Page: Really Funny Bumper Stickers »
Really Funny Stupid Questions
The best of those stupid, dumb, funny, witty and silly questions. Some of them really make you think, some make your laugh, and some are just plain stupid…
Why is it that when someone tells you that there’s billions of stars in the universe, you believe them. But if they tell you there’s wet paint somewhere you have to touch it?
How can there be self-help “groups”?
Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered mothers from Asian countries use? Toothpicks?
If it’s true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn’t zigzag?
Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?
Do people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water know that spelling it backwards is Naive?
If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea does that mean the fifth one enjoys it?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
How did the man who invented cottage cheese know he was done?
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
How did a fool and his money get together?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Can you get cavities in your dentures from using too much artificial sweetner?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word “Lisp” to have a “S” in it?
Why do you call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere, yet call it hemorrhoid when its in your ass?
Page Topic: A collection of the best really dumb, funny, stupid, hilarious, cute and witty rhetorical questions that make you go hmmm.
« Previous Page: Really Funny Bad Starting Paragraphs of Novels | Next Page: Really Funny Bumper Stickers »
153 Responses to “Really Funny Stupid Questions””
COMMENT (Not all comments are approved, including rude comments and those with strong language).
Section: Stupid, Funny Quotes, Questions & Sayings
January 12th, 2008 at 12:34 am
I’ve got a couple for you:
How can bubbles scrub if they don’t have hands?
Why aren’t hot pads hot?
January 12th, 2008 at 5:15 pm
When you’re sitting on the upstairs floor, are u sitting on the downstairs ceiling?
January 13th, 2008 at 5:36 pm
What weighs more: A ton of feathers or a ton of rocks?
January 16th, 2008 at 12:41 am
funny definition:
Atheism: a non-prophet organization
January 20th, 2008 at 4:12 am
If toast always lands butterside down, and cats always land on their feet, what would happen if you strapped toast to a cats back and dropped it?
January 21st, 2008 at 11:49 am
if deaf people go to court is it still called a hearing>?
January 21st, 2008 at 5:59 pm
should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
January 24th, 2008 at 12:07 pm
If you choke a smurf, what colour will it turn?
January 26th, 2008 at 5:00 am
do our ear drums vibrate when sound waves enter the ear.
January 26th, 2008 at 10:04 am
why dont sheep shrink when it rains?
January 28th, 2008 at 5:56 pm
why is is that you continually go back to the fridge or cabinet in hope that something new will be there?
January 29th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
can vegaterions eat animal crackers
January 30th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
if vegetarions eat vegtables.. what do huminitarians eat?
January 30th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
IF A MAN WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALTIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?
January 31st, 2008 at 5:35 pm
what happens if your scared to death twice?
February 2nd, 2008 at 7:36 pm
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Why do you sterilize needles for lethal injection?
If you choke a smurf, what color would he turn into?
I dont get it…
February 4th, 2008 at 4:15 am
if u get shot in the head, and go to heaven, do u live in heaven the rest of your life with a bullet in your head?
everyone is here for a purpose - does that mean everyone is here for the same purpose of for individual purposes?
if a light sabor was swung into superman’s body, would it pearce him or not?
February 7th, 2008 at 6:09 pm
Why cant a heterosexual guy tell another heterosexual guy he thinks his booty’s fly?
February 8th, 2008 at 6:37 am
can u cry under water
February 9th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
why are four wheelers called bikes when bike is short for bicycle?
February 9th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
what is so possible about the mission impossible?
February 9th, 2008 at 8:05 pm
what happenes if you cross a reptile with someone who is allergic to reptiles?
February 11th, 2008 at 10:47 pm
If today is today, then tommorow never comes
Yesterday was never there
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
When the sun sets, does the ocean put it out?
February 13th, 2008 at 5:55 pm
IF CHICKENS HAD LIPS COULD THEY WHISTLE?
February 14th, 2008 at 7:30 am
If practice makes perfect and there is no such thing as perfect then why practice?
February 15th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
the more you study the more you know. the more you know the more you forget. the more you forget, the less you know… So why study?
February 15th, 2008 at 10:42 pm
Can an oriental person become disoriented?
February 18th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
If olive oil is made of squeezing olives,then what are baby oil made from?
February 19th, 2008 at 9:07 am
[…] bottles of Evian water know that spelling it backwards is Naive? If 4 out of 5 people suffer from [COLOR=blue ! important][COLOR=blue ! important]diarrhea[/color][/color] does that mean the fifth one enjoys it? If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too? […]
February 19th, 2008 at 4:46 pm
where is the green mile?
February 20th, 2008 at 8:33 am
If the grass is always greener on the other side, then once you get on the other side, will you want to come back? will you ever be on the greener side?
March 1st, 2008 at 8:40 am
If goose plural is geese, then why isn’t moose plural meese?
March 2nd, 2008 at 6:46 pm
Why do they serve a round pizza in a square box?
March 5th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
Do people who use sign language see little hands in their head when they think about what someone said or do they hear words ?
March 8th, 2008 at 5:20 am
if superman was so smart why were his underpants on the outside?
March 8th, 2008 at 9:42 am
Why when i wind up my watch i start it, but when i wind up this sentecne i finsh it!
Why can we say the teacher taught, but why cant we say the preacher praught!
Why is everything that goes by watr “car”go and everything by land is “ship”ment!
Why do we drive on “park”ways and park in “drive”ways!
March 8th, 2008 at 10:42 am
why…
March 8th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
Why doesn’t tarzan have a beard? I mean he lives with freaking monkeys how could he shave? and he thinks that he is monkey and monkeys don’t shave so there for how does he not have a hairy face?
March 8th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
Can you cry underwater?
If “bra” is singular why is “Panties” plural?
March 10th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
if you eat a kit-kat, but you’re thinking of a twix, isn’t that considered cheating?
if Jesica Alba is naked but no one is around to see it, do I still get aroused?
March 10th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
Tarzan shaved with his knife… Read the original books and learn something…
March 12th, 2008 at 6:05 pm
Think about it
if the sky is the limit what is space? over the limit
if electricity comes from electrons what does morality come from
what is the speed of dark
what hair coulour do they put on bald peoples drivers licences
March 13th, 2008 at 6:28 am
they probably write “na” for not applicable!
March 13th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
some of these things are just nonscense!!…but yet somehow they’re funny!!
March 15th, 2008 at 6:52 pm
if a fat man falls in the forest…do the trees laugh?
March 16th, 2008 at 6:50 am
if you drilled a hole through the earth from one end to the other and jumped in. would you fall all the way through to the other side or would you fall down half and climb up other half?
March 18th, 2008 at 1:07 am
round piza is seved in a square box cause you cant make a round box that can squish into a flat pack.
March 18th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
do vegetarians eat animal crackers
March 19th, 2008 at 11:04 am
why are all of these questions unanswerable?”
March 20th, 2008 at 9:41 am
‘coz you’re blonde.
March 21st, 2008 at 10:13 am
if you stay awake all night, do you still have morning breath?
March 22nd, 2008 at 10:42 am
If 7-11 is open 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, why do they need locks on the doors?
March 23rd, 2008 at 6:57 pm
Why is it that when we KNOW the batteries in a remote are dead, we push the buttons harder?
March 24th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
gasarless ou cimetral, hei donsa nidola?
March 24th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
we press the buttons harder because its cool k?
O.o?
March 25th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
why cant you rub ur eyes with your elbows?!!?!?!?!?!
no seriously i tried…it loks like ur smelling ur pits.
newayzzz wooh-who is right- that is why we press the button cuz we’re just cool like that…
March 25th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
Can Fat ppl go skinny-dipping?
March 25th, 2008 at 5:04 pm
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares why did they make a song about it?
If You go on a blind date dose that mean ur date is blind?
If You are not wearing clothes then what is your underwear?
March 26th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
u guys r funny!!!!!!!!1 a little strange but funny!!
March 28th, 2008 at 9:29 pm
DUDE .. dis QuestIOns R SOOOO TRuu .. EspeCially DA bAtteRies 1 … lmoa
March 28th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
how come cartoon characters never change clothes?
how come when villians shoot bullets at superman, he stands there and let the bullets hit him, but when they throw the actual gun at him he ducks?
if a cow laughs real hard, does milk skit out its nose.
how come all male super heros have two first names? (bruce wayne, clark kent, peter parker)
March 29th, 2008 at 10:27 pm
hey so what is better since slice bread?
March 29th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
if corn syrup is made from corn, and veggie oil is made from veggies, what is baby oil made from?
‘0′
March 31st, 2008 at 1:59 pm
if a tree falls in a forest and no ones around , do you hear it ?
March 31st, 2008 at 2:00 pm
i mean does it make a sound
March 31st, 2008 at 5:34 pm
If pro is the opposite of con than is progress the opposite of congress
April 2nd, 2008 at 7:03 pm
“bruce wayne”; “clark kent”; ad “peter parker” are not two first names. its first name and last.
April 3rd, 2008 at 6:52 am
2 blondes walk into a building, you would think one of them would have seen it.
April 3rd, 2008 at 6:58 am
accidents happen, just ask your parents
April 5th, 2008 at 11:19 am
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
April 5th, 2008 at 11:21 am
why is it that when the door is open they call ajar but when the jar is open it isnt adoor?
April 5th, 2008 at 11:22 am
wys is it that the night falls but the day breaks?
April 5th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
if a turtle loses its shell is it naked, homeless or both???
April 6th, 2008 at 8:55 pm
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
April 7th, 2008 at 8:17 pm
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Testical. Who said Humpty Dumpty was an egg anyway? If you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant, what do you do?
April 7th, 2008 at 8:26 pm
I saw a funny definition up at #4. Here’s another. What is politics, Well, Poli- or Poly- means many, and tics are parasitic blood-sucking creatures. I gues politics are many parasitic blood-sucking creatures.
April 10th, 2008 at 3:23 am
Why is it that shopping trollies have a mind of their own
April 10th, 2008 at 1:58 pm
If you drop soap does it get dirty?
If someone goes outside to get some air… what were they breathing inside?
Why is it that the first thing they teach you on an airplane is how to crash? Does being curled up in a ball help soften the 20,000 foot drop?
April 11th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
you know the signs on store doors that say, “No shoes, NO shirt, No service!”? Well, what about pants?
April 12th, 2008 at 4:37 am
how do I set my laser printer to stun?
if ice can burn then can fire freeze?
why do people seldom look up?
do insect eardrums burst if we step near them?
if computers can shut down, and humans can shut up, does that mean that computers can talk?
April 12th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?
If you have a cold hot pocket, is it just a pocket?
Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn’t be mysteries.
Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?
If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?
You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
April 12th, 2008 at 7:04 pm
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say “you know what…I’m gonna squeeze those pink dangly things and drink whatever comes out”?
April 13th, 2008 at 8:33 am
how hard is hard enough?
April 13th, 2008 at 11:43 pm
why is it impossible to suffocate by holding you’re breath?
why’re thoughts usually pictures?
does nutri grain only work if you’re already super strong…
and the ultimate question is…
why do I keep coming back to this site!?
April 14th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
If money does not grow on trees, why then do banks have branches?
If Barbie is so popular, then why do you have to buy her friends?
If a man is going through his mid-life crisis, if he is playing hide-and-seek, does he lose because he cannot find himself?
After amphibians eat, do they have to wait an hour before getting out of the water?
Why do they report power outages on TV?
If a deaf person goes on trial, is it still called a hearing?
Why do they have braille at drive-up ATMs?
Why does glue not stick to the bottle?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
If the temperature is zero outside today and it’s going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
April 16th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
if u drill a hole through the center of the earth, gravity pulls u down, if you go past the center will u go backwards back to the center?
April 16th, 2008 at 10:50 pm
Glue Doesnt Stick to the bottle because there is no air constantly touching the glue to dry it. #84
if there are right and left shoes why arent there right and left socks.
why is the word abbreviation so long?
And they guy wanted the cow pink thing’s liquid because he saw the babies drinking from it instinctivly #81
April 17th, 2008 at 5:46 pm
How does white out not dry up in the bottle
April 20th, 2008 at 5:42 pm
Who first figured out how to milk a cow, and what did they think they were doing at the time?
If teflon doesn’t stick to antthing, how does it stay on the pan?
Who cares how mucj wood a wood-chuck could-chuck?
April 22nd, 2008 at 4:21 pm
Do you find it a bit unnerving doctors call what they do practice?
April 22nd, 2008 at 6:02 pm
Isn’t the spice of life SPICE?
How come on the Flinstones, they use their feet to power the car. Doesn’t it just make more sense to keep walking?
April 25th, 2008 at 8:51 am
91, because of the laws of inertia, the car would keep moving even after he moved his legs off of the ground.
Why are they called apartments if they are built together?
Why are they called buildings if they’ve already been built?
Why is it called a blacklight if it’s purple?
Why isn’t there another word for thesaurus?
If all of the demons cast out of Beelzebub entered the pigs, would that have made it deviled ham?
Why do they always served deviled eggs at church luncheons.
April 26th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
When you eat a jaw-breaker, why doens’t your jaw break?
When you chew a new-breathe, whos new breathe are you getting?
Why are you stoned when you are high, why not rocked?
You can see the stripes on a tiger, but how do you know he’s clean?
Why is Bill short for William, why not Billiam?
Why are long words called five dollar words, why not million dollar words?
Why is meat from a chicken just called chicken, but from a cow it is beef? Or from a pig it is pork.
May 6th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
okay so when your laying on your stomach your legs are backwards but your arms are frontwards
but if you lay on your back your arms are still frontwards. why?????
May 6th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
wait jk…
when someone says my head hurts so much its not even funny or somthing like that, why would it be funny in the first place?
May 7th, 2008 at 7:38 am
why is it that you never hear of a psychic winning the lottery?
what would happen if a black cat walked under a ladder and broke a mirror?
May 7th, 2008 at 8:11 am
why is it that you read all of these and when your done you try to go tell all your friends these but you cant remeber sh*t.
May 8th, 2008 at 1:27 pm
where does steel wool come from?
May 8th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
can you get cornered in a round room?
May 10th, 2008 at 8:09 am
how come when people talk to their dogs telling them to do sumthing in english they get mad when they wont listen??????
May 13th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
When you’re in Amish country, does Motel 6 leave a light on for you?
May 16th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
haha these are hilarious
May 22nd, 2008 at 4:48 pm
how come you never see a unhappy face
May 22nd, 2008 at 5:50 pm
Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do ‘practice’??
May 22nd, 2008 at 5:57 pm
why is the word abbreviation so long???
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“cute as a button” is that supposed to be a compliment?? since when were buttons cute??
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
why do they put pictures of criminals on the Post Office?? what r we supposed to do write to these people?!? why dont the put their pictures on postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they are delivering the mail??
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why are we scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse??
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
shouldnt we start making the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate??
May 23rd, 2008 at 7:46 pm
would you rather a square pizza in a round box ???
May 24th, 2008 at 12:24 pm
If vegetable oil is made of vegetables, and olive oil is made from olives, then what is baby oil made from?
May 24th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
To number 85:
If the temperature is zero outside today and it’s going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
Welll..according to number 23: If today is today then, tomorrow never comes. Well If today it’s zero degrees, and tomorrow never comes then the temperature will always stay at zero.
May 24th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Why is it when something is bad we say, “oh that’s so retarded.” Why don’t we say things like, “oh that’s so teen pregnancy, or oh that’s so brain cancer?”
May 28th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
If You painted a light bulb black, would it go darker when you turned it on?
May 29th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
How come when you scream “ARGH!!!” in a library everyone stares at you but when you do the same thing on a plane everyone joins in???
June 1st, 2008 at 10:02 am
When lightning hits the sea, why don’t the fish get struck?
June 2nd, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Why is it called a driveway if we park on it
June 2nd, 2008 at 3:37 pm
why do they call it break dancing if you don’t break anything
June 2nd, 2008 at 4:49 pm
When best friends get in a fight and say i never want 2 be friends with you again…….why do u hang out with them the next day?
June 3rd, 2008 at 4:53 pm
The apple doesnt fall far from the tree the tree just grows far from the apple.
June 3rd, 2008 at 10:05 pm
Why do they call them “apple jacks” when they don’t taste like apples?
What would you do for a Klondike bar?
June 5th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
OMG~~ask these questions to ur enemy and they will go crazy!!!
June 6th, 2008 at 3:42 pm
How long does it take 2 drive 2 Europe?
June 6th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Who was the first person to want to eat a shroom out of cow poo
Why is a penny actually worth more than a penny…isn’t whoever is making them losing money
Why did they skip the “E” in the grading system
If there’s a microphone and a mega phone what ever happened to the average phone?
June 7th, 2008 at 10:16 am
I like Pink Floyd, but which one of them is Floyd?
June 9th, 2008 at 10:34 am
some of these are actually really quite funny but i would have to save that most of them you could actually answer by ur self
June 9th, 2008 at 10:35 am
y do they call a hot dog, a hot dog?
June 9th, 2008 at 10:36 am
if blondes are so stupid and people make fun of them, then why do people keep dying their hair blonde?
June 10th, 2008 at 5:53 pm
since most people dont eat computers, y do they call it an apple???
June 10th, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Does Victoria have a secret?
June 12th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
If we haven’t found other intelligent life but it is out there, doesn’t that make us dumb?
June 14th, 2008 at 5:47 am
To 119, victoria does have a secret which is why her brand is victoria’s secret being her secret lol
June 16th, 2008 at 9:32 am
If Donald Duck doesn’t wear pants, then why does he wrap a towel when he comes out from the shower?
June 16th, 2008 at 11:17 pm
Can a teacher give a homeless student homework??
June 17th, 2008 at 6:56 am
Does a fly without no wings be called a walk?
June 19th, 2008 at 12:31 am
Good grief people. Why must you repeat the same things two and three times? Read the whole thing, if you have something new, post it. If its already been said, why say it? Stop wasting out time
June 19th, 2008 at 4:22 am
if swimming is such a good exercise why are whales fo fat?
June 20th, 2008 at 12:45 am
ok al of you guys who were sayin stuff about that person who said something and her user name was blondie well u need to know that blonde is a hair color, not a state of mind! : ) ok thats all*
June 20th, 2008 at 12:48 am
oh and i totally agree w/ Jeff up there cause i read through it all too and i got bored with all the repeats…
June 20th, 2008 at 9:04 am
ummmm… hi this is like a reply thing to the q does victoria have a secret. it applies to queen victoria who had an affair and that was her secret….. thats prob. y they make those type of clothes……..
June 21st, 2008 at 9:47 am
Why do you never see baby Pigeons?
June 24th, 2008 at 9:17 am
if gas is a liquid why is it called gas?
June 24th, 2008 at 10:52 pm
If you dive into a pool of dry ice, when you get out, will you need a towel to dry off?
June 24th, 2008 at 11:00 pm
ya kno how roman noodles, gum, and other thigs have original flavor… what is original supposed to taste like? is it supposed to taste the same reguardless of the product?
June 27th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Do penguins have knees?
June 29th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
What’s another word for Thesaurus?
June 30th, 2008 at 6:13 am
why don’t cat fish have kittens?
July 2nd, 2008 at 7:53 am
why is it called a classified ad if its there to let us know what there selling?
July 2nd, 2008 at 7:55 am
why is it we eat spring rolls year round?
July 4th, 2008 at 7:51 am
Why do you park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?
July 5th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
what do sheep count when they cant sleep?
whats something the poor have, the rich need, and is greater than god?
Answer:nothing-because theres nothing greater than god.=D
do vegetairians eat animal crackers?
if the sun is going down on our side and coming up on there side whouldnt that mean there upside down…?
gravity isnt responsible for people falling in love.♥
define old.
i used to want a BMW now i just want the BM.
lots more. tell me if you want some.
teehee.
ily.
boyslikegirlsaretheshidd
July 6th, 2008 at 10:23 am
Who put the keep off the sign grass on the grass?
July 7th, 2008 at 3:10 am
is the word “dictionary” in the dictionary?
July 7th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
there is true n false, right n wrong, rhetorical questions…does this mean there is rhetorical answers???
July 9th, 2008 at 9:18 am
Does a Bee know it’s going to die when it stings you?
If so, are its final thoughts “this’ll hurt me more than it does you”?
July 10th, 2008 at 8:08 pm
why is there brail on the drive through atm?
July 15th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
Why is Donkey Kong called Donkey Kong?? Where’s the damn donkey?