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Crude Pick up lines: Some Rated R, rude, crude and blunt and sexual pickup lines and chat up lines.
Visitors have been submitting their own funny pickup lines on the main pickup line page but we try to keep most of this site PG, and there are some we haven’t wanted to post on the funny pick up lines and chat up lines page. So we made this page, for more crude, rude, blunt, adult, mature, sexual and inapropriate pick up lines. We still may not post all of your pick up line comments, but this will have some of the ones that were a bit much for the main pick up line page.
So warning- some of these pick up lines may be offensive, rude, crude, or bluntly sexual. If you are easily offended or too young for this, please stop now.
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53 Responses to “Crude Pick up lines: Some Rated R, rude, crude and blunt and sexual pickup lines and chat up lines.””
COMMENT (Not all comments are approved, including rude comments and those with strong language).
Section: Online Dating Jokes
January 31st, 2008 at 1:28 pm
you want my number? You Just Have Too Come Back Too My Place So I Can Bend Over And Get My Fone!!..x..
January 31st, 2008 at 1:31 pm
i wish i was your math homework because then i’d be hard and you’d be doing me on your desk
January 31st, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Im not too good at algabra but U + I = 69
January 31st, 2008 at 1:34 pm
Hi. Do you have any fruit?
because my friend over there said you looked like you had a really nice juicy pair.
February 3rd, 2008 at 12:28 am
guy: i was thinking, we could go back to my house order some pizza and then have sex
girl: no
guy: what u dont like pizza?
is ur dad a lumberjack cuz u just gave me wood
February 4th, 2008 at 6:35 pm
UR HOT
February 4th, 2008 at 11:59 pm
hi.im an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore uranus.
if i flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances of getting head?
if you think Chewbacca is hairy wait till you see my wookie:]
the word of the day is legs, lets say we head back to your place and spread the word.
February 5th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
did you just fart because you just blew me away
my love for you is like diarrhea. it runs forever.
February 12th, 2008 at 5:04 pm
Hey baby, how about we do some maths? We’ll subtract our clothes, I’ll divide my legs and we can multiply ;)
February 12th, 2008 at 5:04 pm
Lets be honest, i want 2 F*** your brains out.
February 12th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
i have a dictionary in my pants.
let’s say we go back to my place and put some words in your mouth.
February 12th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
I’d walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
Im good at math, me + you = 69
Im like domino’s pizza, if I dont come in 30 minutes the next one is free.
Lets kiss like Australians, its just like french kissing only you go down under.
February 12th, 2008 at 5:11 pm
hi.im an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore uranus.
if i flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances of getting head?
if you think Chewbacca is hairy wait till you see my wookie:]
the word of the day is legs, lets say we head back to your place and spread the word.
February 14th, 2008 at 6:34 pm
holy sh*t.
this is dirty stuff.
February 16th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
Are you a farmer? cuz u sure know how to raise a cock.
February 20th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
u sure look like a treasure 2 me. now prove it. show me ur chest.
February 27th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
ifi was gay i wouldnt be all over you
March 3rd, 2008 at 11:38 am
u must be a general cuz my privates are at attention
March 11th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
ok this isn’t a pickup line but take off your clothes I’ll spread my legs and let’s get busy
March 13th, 2008 at 1:54 am
guy:do you like to dance
girl:yeah why
guy: ok well go over there and dance so i can talk to your friend
March 16th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
if you were a book you would be considered FINE PRINT
March 17th, 2008 at 6:34 pm
hey nice shoes…wanna f****?
March 17th, 2008 at 11:43 pm
guy asks girl
did u no the human body has 206 bones??
girl: yes
guy: how would u like another ?
March 21st, 2008 at 11:26 pm
im like taco bell i’ll spice up your night
March 24th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
Giggidy giggidy giggidy giggidy let’s have sex!
March 24th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
if you were a buger i would pick you first
March 24th, 2008 at 8:05 pm
wwwweeeeeee oooooohhhhhh wwwwwweeeeee ooohhh wwwwweeeeee ooooohhhhhhhh whats that you say its the police comming why u ask you just stole my heart away.
March 27th, 2008 at 6:46 am
hey baby, do u work at subway? Cuz u just gave me a footlong
Is ur shirt felt? Do u want it to be?
What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper!!!
March 27th, 2008 at 6:59 pm
Baby,
Did you know that there are over 500 muscles in the body?
Want another one?
March 27th, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Baby, are you in a car cause you driving threw my mind
March 27th, 2008 at 7:04 pm
Guy: Girl, are you from tennessee?
Girl: No, why?
Guy: Cause your the only 10 i see.
March 31st, 2008 at 4:21 am
Guy: What is your ethnic background?
Girl: I have a bit of Irish and French in me. Guy: do you want a bit of Australian in you?
April 6th, 2008 at 7:40 am
My magic watch says you don’t have on any underwear. (Yes I do) damn! It must be 15 minutes fast!
Nice legs. What time do they open?
How about you sit down on my lap and we talk about the first thing that pops up?
April 11th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
Let’s get some eggs and butter. After that lets get busy!
April 17th, 2008 at 6:16 pm
is there a mirror in your pocket? Cause i can see myself in your pants!
April 18th, 2008 at 12:36 am
how much does a polar bear weigh.
enough to break the ice
April 18th, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Are you free tonight or will it cost me?
May 5th, 2008 at 9:03 am
shoot these lines are good
June 19th, 2008 at 11:35 am
How do you like your eggs in the morning, scrambled or fertillized?
June 22nd, 2008 at 5:29 am
Guy: have you tripped over a tree stump?
Girl: no
Guy: how bout a root?
June 22nd, 2008 at 5:30 am
INTERCOURSE!!!
June 22nd, 2008 at 5:34 am
Would you like to pat my shnowzer? Then we can play with my dog
June 22nd, 2008 at 6:07 pm
this is some good stuff lol
July 1st, 2008 at 5:54 pm
i lost my teddy bear
can i sleep with u
July 6th, 2008 at 8:10 am
is you heart in the middle can isee it? i have no more eggs at home can i have yours?!
July 31st, 2008 at 12:09 am
tell the girl that she would look good with 150 extra lbs on her and then say ME
July 31st, 2008 at 2:41 am
* lick your finger and place it on the person*
lets get you outta these wet clothes
August 21st, 2008 at 3:36 pm
What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.
September 5th, 2008 at 3:12 am
Are You from the flintstones
because i can make your bed rock
September 5th, 2008 at 10:45 am
i wish i could rearrange the alphabet so i could put U and I together
September 10th, 2008 at 11:23 am
my lips hurt…. will u kiss um better????
September 15th, 2008 at 8:56 pm
like bacon? wanna strip?
September 18th, 2008 at 6:20 am
I’m an FBI agent (Fine Body Inspector) and I’m gonna have to ask you to assume the position.
Sex is like pizza, even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty darn good!!!!
hehe