Movie Quotes from Airheads: Quotes from the movie Airheads

(to Chris Farley’s character) Hey, man, are you a little over the weight capacity on that belt! Heh heh heh heh heh.

…and there’s gonna be bodies flying around here like rag dolls on fire!

1) who would win in a fight, Lemmy or God?
2) God…
3) trick question asshole, Lemmy Is God!

1)And 200 copies of Mobey Dick
2)The movie or the book?
1)They made a book out of that?

1)I played D and D too! 2)I wore corduroy pants! 3)I used to masturbate…constantly! 4)We’re with you Chaz! 5)I WANT YOUR BODY!

1)I played D and D too! 2/I was the editor of my school magizine 3)I wore corduroy pants! 4)I used to masturbate…constantly! 5)We’re with you Chaz! 6)I WANT YOUR BODY!

1)Where’s the tape? 2)What? We were supposed to get that? 1)Let me see your arm. (twists it with the pliers) 2)AHHHH!!! 1)Get it, retard!

1)Who would win in a fight, Lemme or GOd 2)Lemme 3)WRONG 4)GOD 5)It’s a trick question, Lemme is God 6)HE’S A NARC

1. Rodney King? What’s that supposed to mean?
2. He’s that guy.

1. Why don’t black people like me?
2. Excuse me?
1. It’s just I listen to a lot of rap music and I know how angry black people are and I feel bad for all you guys gotta put up with.

1.) Okay, lemme ask you a question: who’s side did you take in the big David Lee Roth-Van Halen split?
2.) What?
3.) What kind of question is that?
1.) Who’s side did you take: Halen or Roth?
2.) …Van Halen
4.) He’s a cop.

1.) We’ve got to send one person out. 2.) I’ll go. 3.) One of the hostages, doof.

1: Just shut your pie hole. 2: Pie hole, what the hell is that, some kinda cracker slang.

1: The Lone Rangers? Wait a second, you can’t pluralize the Lone Ranger. 2: What’s wrong with that? 1: Well there are 3 of you. You’re not exactly LONE.

And I’ll stab your eyeballs…WITH MY DICK. And blood’s gonna come out of your head. And there’s nothing you can do about it cuz I’m a madman!

Born to raise hell.

Can’t Give In.


Do You Wanna Dance.

For all you guys care this band could be Pip fartin on a snare drum!

Hey,Ian man.Wait til you hear our stuff.We kick ass.

I can’t go to jail. I’m fragile.

I don’t want anything I just don’t want to go outside

I used to masterbate…constantly!

I used to wear courdroy pants
Everyone: Yeah!

I wanna hump in the radio station & give a blow job in the radio station.

I was editor of the school magazine!

I’ll pump your guts so full of lead, you’ll be shitting bullets for a week, you no-dick loser!

I’ll Talk My Way Out Of It.

I’m the one.

I’ve got goosebumps, frankly. For the first time, I’m willing to bet. The Lone Rannnngerrrrsss.

Ian: The Lone Rangers? That’s original. How can you pluralize ‘The Lone Ranger’?

Man#1:The Lone Rangers? How can you pluralize the Lone Ranger? Man#2:What’s wrong wit dat? Man#1:Well, there are three of you. You’re not exactly lone. Shouldn’t you be the three rangers? Man#2:No idea what you’re saying right now. Man#4:You lost me.

My names Pip.


No way out.

oOoOoO serious bumper

Quit screwing on my couch!!!


Shutup Dicksmoke

Still ain’t got no hair on his nuts.

Suzzie: All those blowjobs for nothing…

they’ve got this place sealed up tight than a dolphin’s butt. WATERTIGHT!

This thing smells like piss,man.


We decided to take the cops up on their offer. We ask for a bunch of weird stuff so we can plead insanity later.

We Want The Airwaves.

What are you doin you little buttnut?

What was she one the clidesdale scale? That’s where you figure out how many clidesdales it would take to rip her face off.

You look like half a butt puppet!

You wanna try gettin physical with me?

You’re SCREWING on my $7000 leather couch!

[one of the list of demands]
1.) 67 copies of ‘Moby Dick’.
2.) The movie or the book?
1.) They made a book outta that?

Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Airheads’: Quotes from the movie ‘Airheads’

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