Geek Guys: Jack, you know how you and Diane slept together? Jack: Yeah. Geek Guys: well now that you dont sleep together, but you still sleep together, dont you like get super horny? and if so, how horny? i’ll be quite now so i can listen to your answer. Lisa: Yeah Jack i love to hear your answer. Jack: The answer’s easy. Guys Im gonna be a dad, dads dont get Horny.
(in the backround) HEY, HO,HEY, HO! HEY,HO. HEY, HO! 1) I don’t know about the ‘hey’, but ‘ho’ is right on the money.
)My god Mom! I come and visit you only to tell me you’re a dyke? 2) Now listen to me, you mouthy little shit! 1) Don’t mouthy little shit me, i’m outta here!
…he was a bar of chocolate and the whole school was on the rag…everybody wanted a piece.
…you left your sisters to be with a man. And that man must be the devil himself, for only the devil would turn you against your sisters…
1) (looking at 2’s messy apartment) Oh, my God! You’ve been robbed! 2) No. I’ve been pregnant.
1) And what would you do if we went to the cops and told them that you were selling guns to minors!? To girl minors! 2) I’d just have to kill you.
1) Holy shit! You jsut became a statistic! 2) Wow. I’m not the first.
1) I need your help. 2) Now how in the hell can I help you? 1) My best frined got pregnant. 2) Before you? Well, shit-fire, Kansas! 1) I know. That’s what I said.
1) It was Lucy! She went to the cops! 2) Remember, Kansas, when you point a finger, you have three more pointing back at you. 1) I bet it was her. She’s been the weak tit on this mama cat from the beginning.
1): Technically I don’t think I’m a virgin anymore. This past summer at church camp I think I had my first orgasm. 2): Any sentence that starts with church camp aint leading to the big O.
1)Diane, listen to this. It says you’re gonna have mood swings, uncontrollable gas- 2) More proof God’s a guy. 1)-and sex dreams where you actually have an orgasm! 2) The Virgin Mary must’ve stuck that one in!
1)If you could be Count Chocula or Trix the Rabbit, who would you be? 2)Trix…1)I love this lady!!!
1)If you could be Count Chocula or Trix the Rabbit, who would you be? 2)Trix…3)I love this lady!!!
1- So, what are you? Anorexic or bulimic?
1- Don’t make me hate you.
1.)Am I The only one doing this. At least I watch Dog Day Afternoon 2.) Excuse me? Can you please keep your voice down. We don’t wanna introduce anger in to the womb. 1.) How would you like me to introduce my foot into your ass?
1.Hey, Lisa, did you run into Carmen Electra last summer? 2.No. 1.Oh, ’cause it looks like you got some of her tits on you.
a faliure to plan is a plan for faliure
ANY STORY THAT BEGINS AT CHURRCH CAMP AIN’T ABOUT TO END IN THE BIG O.
Be careful, have fun. Ski masks are so done. Use these masks to fight the power and never bend over in the shower.
But give us corn, the kind you plant, not eat, and we’ll plant it, and grow it, and, you know, eat it.
cheerleader’s kick !!!!
Cheerleaders kick……. ass!
CHEERLEADERS:HEY HO,HEY HO,HEY HO.LISA:I DON’T KNOW ABOUT THE HEY PART,BUT THEY GOT THE HO PART RIGHT.
Diane- i’m serious, Kansas, is was like some sort of damn Gift of the Magi thing (looking down at her pregnant stomach) oh i’m sorry sweetie-shit, i need a getaway car!
Diane: (looking at the sonogram screen) OH MY GOD
Cleo: The baby has two heads
Lucy: IT’S TWINS
Diane: Oh so I’m not just super fat
DIANE:SO WHAT ARE YOU,ANOREXIC OR BULIMIC?FERN:NO JUST SKINNY.DIANE:DON’T MAKE ME HATE YOU.
Did you say you are pregnant or you were pregnant. You had it, threw it out, and now you’re gonna go dance all night?
Does anyone have an extra pair of panties?
DON’T MARTHA FREAKING STUART ME!
FEMALE INMATE:THEM SURE ARE SOME SWEET SKIRTS YOU GOT THERE.CHEERLEADER:OUTFITS,ACTULLY.CHEERLEADING OUTFITS.INMATE:THEY SURE ARE.
Finally, those dipshits in blue followed up on my evidence.
gOOD MORNING SUNSHINE!
Good Morning Sunshine, remember these are the happiest days of your life…so far
Hannah: well im techincally not a vigin anymore. At church camp one time i went horse backriding with the nuns at night and you know we were trotting pretty hard. And i think i had my first orgasm.
HANNAH:DON’T BE A WHORE AND A MURDERER.OH,I’M SORRY I DIDN’T MEAN TO CALL YOU A WHORE.IT’S JUST THAT I HEAR IT AT MY CHURCH SO OFTEN.
HANNAH:MY MOM WAS TELLING ME THAT IN PRISON,THEY SHOVE BROOMSTICKS UP YOUR…..(PHONE CLICKS)
HANNAH:WHY DO I HAVE TO GO?KANSAS:BECAUSE YOU’RE A VIRGIN.THE DARK FORCE WON’T DICK AROUND WITH YOU.
He was a bar of chocolate and the whole school was on the rag — everybody wanted a piece.
He was like a bar of chocolate, and the whole school was on the rag.
Hi! im diane’s mom didi you can remember my name because of my DOUBLE Ds!
I just called to tell you that Conan talked about us again last night.
I need some where to put this. If anyone asks what you know, that’s right, you don’t know shit
I’m about to blow like a bolemic on christmas dinner
I’m gonna be a dad. Dads don’t get horny.
If the O.J. trial taught us anything, it taught us that, in America, you can cut somebody’s head off and still be innocent as long as you have enough money.
In my youth group, i read about how female prisoners have to shave their heads to rid themselves of the lice they got from leading dirty lives! Oh no! I’m gonna be someone’s bald bitch!
Jack-Aww what the hay, We’re getting married! Diane’s dad- No! YES!! Diane- But not before I have our baby.
Just shut up and look at Keanu
Kanas: Rule number one in robbery you never take off the mask no matter what happens you never take off the mask.
Cleo: I’m sorry Kansas.
Kanas: God! Rule number two, no names, no names you go damn retard.
Kanas: What are you the god damn Bionic Woman.
Cleo: I pulled and it and it came off.
Kansas: This is just great, now we gotta go through the front.
Kansa’s mom: U dont look nothing like ur picture.
Kansas: Granma and granpa sent you a picture of a neighbour hood girl
they didnt want you to bust out of here and come kidnap me.
Kansas mom: I was starting to think i killed the wrong guy.So why are u here anyways ? To tell me how much u hate me?
Kansas: I dont hate you mom. I need your help.
Kansas Mom: Now how in the hell can i help you?
Kansas: My best friend got pregnant.
Kansas mom: Whoo Hoo Before you. (They exchange a high five)
Kansas: I know thats what i said.
Kansas: Listen we wanna help her get some money for the baby by robbing a bank.
Kansas Mom: Well shit fire Kansas that’s the sweetest thing i ever heard.
Kansas: But we cant exactly figure out how to u no DO IT.
Kansas Mom: Kansas this is like you asking me to help you with ur homework.
KANSA’S MOM:U dont look nothing like ur picture.
KANSAS: Granma and granpa sent you a picture of a neighbour hood girl
they didnt want you to bust out of here and come kidnap me.
KANSA’S MOM: I was starting to think i killed the wrong guy.So why are u here anyways ? To tell me how much u hate me?
KANSAS: I dont hate you mom. I need your help.
KANSA’S MOM: Now how in the hell can i help you?
KANSAS: My best friend got pregnant.
KANSA’S MOM: Whoo Hoo Before you. (They exchange a high five)
KANSAS: I know thats what i said.
KANSAS: Listen we wanna help her get some money for the baby by robbing a bank.
KANSA’S MOM: Well shit fire Kansas that’s the sweetest thing i ever heard.
KANSAS: But we cant exactly figure out how to u no DO IT.
KANSA’S MUM: Kansas this is like you asking me to help you with ur homework.
KANSAS:IT’S BAD ENOUGH I GOTTA TELL EVERYONE MY MOM’S IN PRISON.WHAT,NOW I HAVE TO TELL THEM SHE’S A BIG DYKE,TOO?
kansas:son-of-a-blue-balled bitch i always get this one
Kansas? Listen, Jack sold our getaway car! It was like some goddamn Gift of the Magi thing (looking at her pregnant belly) oops i’m sorry sweetpea, swearing is just a way- oh shit Mommy needs a getaway car!
Lisa: Now the computer maniacs have more to talk about besides Agent Scully and their most resent wet dream.
Look, Sipowitz, I said I’d tell you everything–I was just hoping to finish up before menopause kicks in.
Morning, sunshine, remember,except for the morning sickness, the blinding back pain, annd the embarrassing,uncontrollable gas, these are the best days of your life……so far! Hey wait a minute not so fast! Following your dream isn’t a crime. No one suspects you. Nobody even has a clue!
Mrs Hill): Kansas, I’d like you to meet someone special (a woman walks over). Kansas): Jesus Christ Mom! It’s bad enough you’re in prison! But you’re a dyke too?! Mrs. Hill): Shut up! You mouthy little….Shit! Kansas): That’s it, I’m outta here. Mrs. Hill): Hold on a minute she ain’t my bitch if that’s what you think. She’s a specialist in banks.
Never point a finger at some one, ’cause you will always have three pointing back at you.
Next Christmas, I’ll buy you the diamond to go in it!
Nobody ever got ahead by sitting on their behind!
now the computer maniacs have more to talk about besides agent Scully and their most resent wet dream
now the computer maniacs have more to talk about then agent scully and their resent wet dream.
Oh my god! you know, i read about this it’s called pregnancy insanity!
Oh my god, you just became a statistic
Oh, please don’t be a whore and a murderer, Di!
proceed dungion master quad
Remeber nobody gets ahead by sitting on their behinds!!!!!
Should we really be doing this?
Huh do not take off the mask no matter what happens never take off the mask.
Shut up and look at Keanu
shutup before i put my foot in your ass !!
so they won state… BFD
so when your dad said, i never want to see you effin faces again, do you think he meant forever, forever, or just until your mom wakes up?
That really burned my toast!
The Beatles were wrong! Love isn’t all you need. Love won’t buy my baby diapers, love won’t buy groceries, and love sure as hell won’t buy my new jeans after i lose my baby weight. Soon i’ll just be some fatass sitting on the couch wearing chick jeans. WAHHHHH!!!
their chearing blows like a bulimic after christma dinner!
Their cheer blew like a bulimic after Christmas dinner.
Then there’s Rachel…she’s like this oober christian or something. Doesn’t really say much. In fact if she wasn’t kind of pretty people would say, ‘Hey, who’s the tard?’
Those of us with parents know they have rules because they care.
We’re not acting like cheerleaders, we’re acting like sorority girls!
What a sad waste of man.
When your dad said ‘I never wanna see your F-ing faces again’, do you think forever, or just until your mom wakes up?
White Trash Betty
Whoa, wait a minute! You watched the Apple fucking Dumpling Gang???
Yeah? Well, how would you like me to introduce my foot into your ass!
You watched Apple Fucking Dumpling gang?
[Her speech for her homecoming campaign] It’s all about the cows. Youth. Agriculture. 4-H RULES!
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Sugar and Spice’: Quotes from the movie ‘Sugar and Spice’