1) …and this must be Joanna. Electroshock? 2) But she’s doing so well. 1) Hello little energizer.
1) That man, Hank…before he tried to kill you he went to see his ex-wife and five of her new boyfriends. He shot all of them. The wife is in critical condition and 2 are on life support.
1. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I stutter. 2. You mean, when you were younger? 1. No, I still have it. I just work extra hard to control it.
1:Aren’t you Bobbi Markowitz? I love you’re books, exspecially your last one. What was it called; about your relationship with your mother?
2:I love you, but please die!
1:I have to go home and make cupcakes!
2:Cause you’ve only made 5,000.
Alright…Now it’s time to slim and scrub. Let’s all be washing machines! Chooga chooga chooga chooga chooga chooga [cont.]…spin cycle ladies! And woooosh! and Wooosh! and Woooosh!
Am I game? Boy! Am I game!
At Betty Ford.
But, why? Because we can.
Claire – We like to call this routine CLAIRE-OBICS. Woman – Because her name is Claire.
Dave set me loose at Bergdorf’s, and I went mad!
Guy 1:I used to work for AOL.
Joanna:Is that why all the women are so slow?
I guess I want to be remembered.
I know, why don’t i get a whole bunch of pine cones and spell BIG JEW in the snow on my front yard!
I’ll just die if I don’t get this recipe…..
If I had to go around apologizing every time I got smashed, I’d go around for the rest of my life saying ‘I’m sorry! I’m sorry. I’m sorry’
It was all..so ugly. The next day, when I glanced across the table at their lifeless bodies, I thought, what have I done? Or better yet, what can I do to make the world a better place? So I created Mike because I knew that he was a man that other men would listen to.
Joanna Eberhard: [seeing Bobbie as a robot] What… have… they… done to you?
Oh I feel like Nancy Drew solving the Midlife Crisis!
She cooks as good as she looks, Ted.
She cooks as good as she looks.
So I asked myself, ‘Where would people never notice a town full of robots? Connecticut!’
Walter Kresby: Only castrating, Manhattan career bitches wear black. Is that what you want to be?
Joanna Eberhart: Ever since I was a little girl.
Well, I’m sure we’re all excited to be here at the Stepford Women’s Book Club, I can’t tell you…
What are you doing, making anthrax???
You came to the right town.
You kind of look like Betty Crocker.
You Know What I’ll Do? I’ll Attach A Pinecone To My Vibrator And Have A Very Merry Xmas
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Stepford Wives, The’: Quotes from the movie ‘Stepford Wives, The’