Ouiser- Yes Annelle I pray!! Well there, I said it…I hope your satisfied. Annelle- I suspected this all along… Ouiser- OH! Well don’t expect me to come to one o’ your churches! One o’ those damn tent revivals with all them Bible beaters doin’ God knows what! They’ll prob’ly make me eat a live chicken!! Annelle- Not on your first visit!! Clairee- VERY good Annelle. Spoken like a true smart-ass…
I will not let my own personal tragedies interfere with my ability to do good hair.
#1 That is one ugly dog. What kind of dog is that? #2 Well, if it had hair it would be a St. Bernard
#1) Anne Boleyn had six toes. #2) Who’s Anne Berlin? #1) Anne BOLEYN, she was one of the six wives of Henry the VIIIth. #2) Oh, well I never watch public television.
#1- It’s a lil’ bit poofier than I would normally do…but I’m nervous. #2- Ohhh, I’m not worried about that too much! I usually wrap mah eentire head in toilet paper when I go to bed at night…so it usually gets pretty smooshed down in that process anyway.
#1: Oh Drum would never point a gun at a lady. #2: He’s a real gentleman. Bet he takes the dishes outta the sink before he pees in it!
(1) Hi, Miss Ouiser. (2) Ugh, leave me alone!
(1)Oh Anelle, for Christ Sakes! (2) Who? (1) Christ. (2) Who did you say? 1) Christ! Christ! Christ! 2) Are you speaking of our Lord? Is that whose name you’re taking in vain? (1) That’s the one! (2) Oh, I’m sorry Sammy. But I’m not about to spend the rest of my life with someone I’m not going to run in to the hereafter. (1) Oh Anelle, God Damn it!
(Clairee): I’ve just been to the dedication of the new children’s park. (Truvy): Yeah, how did that go? (Clairee): Janice Van Meter got hit with a baseball. It was fabulous. (Truvy): Was she hurt?(Clairee): I doubt it. She got hit in the head.
(SAMMY) I’ve never felt so uncomfortable in my entire life! (ANELLE) We’ll talk about uncomfortable when you’re nine months pregnant, okay.
(Upon receiving a piece of cake) There ain’t nothin’ like a good piece of ass.
…my personal tragedy will not interfere with my ability to do good hair.
1) Back at Truvy’s, when I said the sooner my body fails the better off I’ll be…I should’ve not said that in front of Shelby. And I didn’t mean it. 2) Ouiser, nobody pays any attention to you.
1) Hell, Owen Jenkins! 2) Hello Ouiser, remember me? 3) My’ gawd you look different…have you shrunk?
1) I bet you money she paid $500 for that dress and don’t even bother to wear a girtle 2) Looks like two pigs fighting in a blanket.
1) I’m just so…so…so MAD! I could hit someone! 2) Here! Hit Weeza!
1) Movie! Movie! 2) It’s old and black and white! 3) Nothing dirty there… 4) I got it, a classic…a tale of two kidneys!
1) Okay, no more transplant jokes, daddy doesn’t like em’ 2) Okay, Ma…give me…your… internal organs!
1) Ouisa, this is Jackson’s aunt, Fern from Alexandria. She made the cake. 2) You did this? 3) Oh it’s simple, really. It just takes patience. 2) You only do Armadilles? 3) No, I can do anything. Except snakes, I don’t have the counter space.
1) Shelby loves you very much 2) I hope so…cost me 60 bucks to rent this sucker. 1) I’m being serious. 2) So am I. I got the receipt right here.
1) Shelby, if I don’t have anything, I’m going to send one of the boys to get some delicate pink nail polish. 2) Oh great idea, Mama. I would love to see what the boys would pick out.
1) Who gives this woman in marriage……? 2) HER MOTHER AND I DO!
1) You are evil, and you must be destroyed. 2) Mother nature is taking care of that faster than you can.
1) Your husband? 2) uh..my husband? 1) Yes! 2) Well, I don’t know. 1) You don’t know?? 2) I’m not sure. 1) You’re not sure? I’m intrigued. Are you married or not? These are not difficult questions!
1)Claree! This is just a gesture! We are not feeding Drum until the end of time. 2)Drum loves pork and beans…eats them with everything. 1)That explains a lot.
1)Ha Ha, and the Doctor’s said Shelby couldn’t have children! 2)Yeah, what do they know?! 3)The doctor’s said Shelby SHOULDN’T have children. There’s a big difference. 4)This baby is not exactly great news.
1)I’m lucky. I don’t have to wait. Mama’s gonna give me one of her kidney’s. 2)When?! 1)We check in tomorrow mornin. So you better get goin’ on my nails.
1)Ouisa’s never done a religious thing in her life!
2)Now that is not true. When I was in college my friends and I dressed up as nuns and went barhopping!
1)Sammy what is this in my fridgedair? 2)Beer 1)I don’t know what you keep in yours, but you will not keep liquor in mine! 2)Oh Christ Annelle. 1)What did you say? 2)Christ 1)Is that our Lord’s name you’re taking in vain? 2)That’s the one. 1)I don’t think I can spend my life with someone I won’t see in the hereafter 2)Christ, Christ, Christ 1)I think we should pray! 2)Oh I’d rather eat dirt.
1)Somebody’s at the door.
2)I think it’s for daddy
1)The new Devils’ jerseys are fabulous, such a deep shade of purple. Now tell me, Bob, would you call this color grape or aubergine? 2)Shut up! 1)What?! 2)You’re makin’ a fool outa yourself, Clairee! 1)I am not! 2)This is football — all people wanna hear about is touchdowns and injuries. They don’t give a damn about this grape shit!
1)Well, the rehearsal dinner was a real experience. 2)It was at Jackson’s uncle’s place out on the river. 1)Jackson comes from a good old southern family with good old southern values — you either shoot it, stuff it, or marry it. 2)They’re simply outdoorsy, that’s all.
1)Where’s your father?
2)Coffee kicked in.
1)With the wedding cake in the dining room and the groom’s cake…hidden in the car port? 2)Shelby and I agree on one thing- 1&2)the groom’s cake! 1)It’s awful! It’s in the shape of a giant armadillo. 3)An armadillo? You’re joking, right? 1)No, Jackson’s got this aunt and she makes these cakes. 4)Sounds interesting. 2)It’s repulsive. It’s got gray icing. I can’t even begin to imagine how you make gray icing! 1)But the worst is the cake part, is red velvet cake — blood red! People are gonna be hacking into this poor animal and it’ll look like it’s bleeding to death!!
1)Would you call that color Grape or Aubergene? 2)Shut up! 1)What? 2)You’re makin a fool outta yourself Claree 1)I am not! 2)All the listeners want to hear about are touchdowns and injuries! No one gives a damn about that Grape shit!
1)Would you like something? 2)Huh? Oh no, no thanks. 1)Are you sure? It’s free? 2)Oh? 1)Come on, what’ll it be? 2)A cherry Coke.
1. Besides, I kind of like the idea of hiring some one w/ a past. 2. She can’t be more than 18. She hasn’t had time to have a past. 1. Come on Clairee! This is the eighties! If you can achieve puberty, you can achieve a past.
1. Did you get those magnolias out of my tree? 2. The judge has not yet decided whose tree it is. 1. It is MY tree.
1. My colors are blush and bashful.
2. Her colors are pink and pink.
1. Sammy dewayne desoto, what is this is my frigidaire?
1. I do not care what you keep in your refrigerator, but you will not keep liquor in mine.
2. Christ, Annelle!
1.Is that the name of our Lord and Savior that you are taking in vain?
2.That’s the one!
1. What am I gonna do? This dog is on his last legs? 2. Serve him on toast!
1.Drum! I know you’re in there!2. I think it’s the door. 3. I think it’s for Daddy.
1/_Boys? Where’s your father?
2/_His coffee just kicked in
1/_I’ve just been to the dedication of the new children’s park.
2/_Yeah?, how did that go?
1/_Janice Van Meader got hit with a baseball…. It was fabulous.
2/_Was she hurt?
1/_I doubt it…. She got hit in the head
1/_In a good shoe, I wear a size six, but a seven feels so good, I buy a size eight
2/_ This is an eight and a half
1/_Well, that wasn’t a very Christian thing to do.
2/_Oh Annelle, ya gotta lighten up!
1: My colors are blush and bashful. 2: Her colors are pink and pink. 1:My colors are blush and bashful momma.
1:i havent walked out of my house without lycra on these thighs in twenty years 2: thats because you were brought up right
A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.
All gay men have track lightin’ and all gay men are named Mark, Rick or Steve.
All gay men have track lightin’. And all gay men are named Mark, Rick, or Steve.
All gay men have track lighting, and all gay men are named Mark, Rick, or Steve.
All gay men have track lighting. And all gay men are named Mark, Rick, or Steve.
All people want to hear about is touchdowns and injuries. They don’t care about that grape shit.
Ambolin, she had six fingers
weezer- what happened to the other 4, clarie- she had eleven total,
weezer- are you trying to confuse me clarie
and the nicest thing I can say about her is all her tatoos were spelled correctly
Annelle, I just thought Sammy wouldn’t mind you reading the bible in bed as long as you were wearing something inspirational!
Annelle, why don’t you just take your bible and shove it where the sun don’t shine!
Annelle: I can’t believe it! I’m a beautician!
Truvy: Uh uh uh uh, glamour technician!
Annelle: Nobody move, Nobody move! My contact!
Annelle:Nobody move I’ve lost my contact!
Are you high, Clairee?
At least that’s what my mind says, I wish someone would explain it to my heart
At least that’s what my mind says…I wish someone would explain it to my heart.
BOYS! DON’T DECORATE YOUR SISTER’S CAR WITH CONDOMS! IT’S TACKY!
C’mon, Ouisa. You know I love you more than my luggage.
Cause, I’m an old woman! We’re supposed to wear funny hats and grow vegetables in the dirt!
Clairee, this is just a gesture! We’re not feeding Drum till the end of time!
Clairee, you know I’d rather walk on my lips than to criticize anyone…
Clairee: Shelby, you made a good catch. Louisiana lawyers do well, whether they want to or not!
Clairee: You made a good catch Shelby. Louisiana lawyers do well, whether they want to or not!
Clairee:Would you call this a grape or auburgene.
Ouiser:All they care about is touch downs and injury’s
they don’t give a damn about that grape shit!!
claree, you are a bitch from hell. and you must die.
Clarie- All gay men have track lighting and are named Mark, Rick or Steve.
Weeza – Track lighting I love mine, my nephew installed it.
Clarie – How is he?
Weeza – Steve’s fine.
Clary- Looks like two pigs fightin under a blanket
Course it can.
Daddy always says an ounce of pretension is worth a pound of manure.
Damn It! I’m pleasant! I just saw Drum Eatenton at the Piggly Wiggly and I smiled at the son-of-a-bitch! I couldn’t help myself!
Do you have a reindeer stuck up your butt?
Drink your juice, Shelby!
Drum left…he couldn’t take it…Jackson left…I find it amusing…men are supposed to be made out of steel or something.
Drum, eat shit and die!!
Eat shit and die.
Everything is horrible! Banky that’s my husband- he just vanished last week. He took all the money, my jewelry, the car…most of my clothes were in the trunk….he’s in big trouble with the law. Drugs or something….cops keep questioning me but I don’t know anything! They said our marriage may not be legal.
Get off my bench!
Givin birth to Jack Jr. just put too much strain on my kidney’s and now they are kaput.
God don’t care which church you go to as long as you show up
God don’t care which church you go, long as you show up!
Half a Chinqapin County’d give their eye teeth to take a whack a Weeza (Louisa)!!
He don’t know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt!
He is a boil on the butt of humanity.
He’s a real gentleman, I bet he even takes the dishes out of the sink before he pees in it.
He’s a real gentleman, I bet he takes the dishes out of the sink before he pees in it!
He’s a real gentleman. I bet he takes the dishes out of the sink before he pees in it!
He’s a real gentleman…I bet he takes the dishes outta the sink before he pees in it!!
He’s so confused he doesn’t know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt.
Her colors are pink and pink. Momma my colors are blush and bashful.
Here comes miss Weezer, I’m supposed to give her a pedicure today. I hate working on her feet. Could be worse she could have wanted a bikini waxin’.
HERE! Hit this! We’ll sell T-shirts, saying I slapped Ouisa Boudreaux. Ouisa, this is your chance to do something for your fellow man. Knock her lights out M’lynn.
Hey! Ret’s here! Let’s connect the bald spots!
I am pleasant? Damn it! Yesterday I saw Drum Eatonton at the Piggly Wiggly and I smiled at the son of a bitch for I couldn’t help myself!
I do not see plays because I can sleep at home. I don’t watch movies because they’re full of naked people, and I don’t read books cuz if they’re any good they’ll make ’em into a mini-series!
I don’t go see plays, because I can sleep at home for free.
I don’t like Belle Marmillion. I don’t trust anyone who does their own hair. I don’t think it’s normal.
I don’t want to miss the Nativity made entirely out of sparklers!
I don’t watch movies, baecause they’re trash and they got nothin’ but naked people in them.
i dont go to the theatre because i can nap at home for free, and i dont watch movies cos they aint got nothin’ but naked people in em! And i dont read books cos if theyre any good theyill make em into a mini series
I feel so bad, I just want to hit something…I want to hit it hard! Here hit this…c’mon hit her…we’ll sell t-shirts saying I took a wack of weezer!
I have new shoes…I have to break em’ in.
I have to get rid of about a zillion birds before Shelby’s reception this afternoon,or I will have to deal with my wife and I make it a point never to deal with my wife!
I realize as a woman how lucky I am. I was there when that wonderful creature drifted into my life…and I was there when she drifted out. It was the most precious moment of my life.
I saw Drum Eatenton at the A & P and I smiled at the sonofabitch!
I want to know why! I could run to Texas and back, but my daughter can’t, she never, I want to know why! I’m so mad I just want to hit something until they feel as bad as I do, I just want to hit something, and hit it hard.
I was screaming at my Husband
I was there when that wonderful creature drifted into my life, and I was there when she drifted out. It was the most precious moment of my entire life.
I WAS THERE WHEN…
I wear a size six, but a size seven feels so good I wear I size 8.
I would never have chosen white, so filthy. I mean LOOK at those grass stains. Impossible to get out.
I would rathe have 5 minutes of wonderful, than a lifetime of nothing special.
I would rather have 30 minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.
I would rather have thirty minutes of ‘wonderful’ than a lifetime of ‘nothing special’.
I would rather have thirty seconds of ‘wonderful’ than a lifetime of ‘nothing special.’
I’d rather have 30 seconds of wonderful, than a lifetime of nothing special.
i’d rather walk on my lips than talk bad about someone..but that looks like two pigs fighting under a blanket
I’ll bet he takes the dishes out of the sink before he pees in it!
I’m a chain!!!!!
i’m fine, i’m fine i could walk to texas and back, but my daughter can’t, she never could. I just wanna know why, oh god i just wanna understand. No no i was suppose to go first i was always ready to go first.
I’m fine. I’M FINE! I could jog all the way to Texas and back. But my daughter can’t! She never could!
I’m fine……I’m FIIIIIIIIIIINE!!!!!! I can run back & forth all the way to Texas, but my daughter can’t! She never could!
I’m just yelling at my husband. I can do that any time.
I’m not crazy M’Lynn. I’ve just been in a very bad mood for 40 years!!
I’m not crazy Melynn, I’ve just been in a very bad mood for fourty years.
I’m not crazy Milynn. I’ve just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.
I’m not crazy Mylynn, I’ve just be in a very bad mood for forty years!
I’m not crazy, Ma’Lynn…I’ve just been in a very bad mood for forty years!
I’m not crazy, My’lynn! I’ve just been in a very bad mood for forty years!
i’m pleasant, dammit i’m pleasant. i saw drummond at the piggly wiggly and i smiled at the son of a bitch before i could help myself.
I’m pleasant. Damn it! I saw Drum Eatenton at the Piggly Wiggly this morning, and I smiled at the son of a bitch ‘fore I could help myself.
Iced Tea, house wine of the south.
If have nothing nice to say, come sit next to me!
If you don’t have anything nice to say come sit by me
Im so mad I want to hit something, I want to hit it hard.
In a good shoe, I wear a size six, but a seven feels so good, I buy a size eight.
In college we would dress up as nuns and go bar hoppin’
it looks like two pigs fighting in her ass
It looks like two pigs, fighting under a blanket
It will not be a question of wether or not I can carry your child. He will cut your thing off!
Jackson found a firearm — we may never see him again.
Jackson…you’re going to have to get her suit. You know the one with the little cherries on the lapel?
Janis Van Meter got hit in the head with a baseball. It was fabulous.
JONATHAN! DON’T YOU DECORATE YOUR SISTER’S CAR WITH CONDOMS, IT’S TACKY!
Kill Rex Kill, bite him in the balls, bite him in the balls!
Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion
Lenelle: Sammy, what’s this in my Frigidaire? Sammy: Oh, Christ, Lenelle. Lenelle: What? Sammy: Christ. Christ, Christ, Christ.
Lenelle: Is that our Lord’s name you’re takin’ in vain? I don’t know if I want to spend my life with someone I won’t meet again in the sweet hereafter.
Let’s just say… if you and Jackson wanna practice safe sex.
Your all set !!
Lookin’ for you.
LOOKING FOR QUOTE IN DEATH SCENE
Looks good, looks real real good
Looks like a stuffed pig bled all over my hands!
Looks like two pigs fightin’ under a blanket
Looks like two pigs fighting under a blanket
M’Lynn you just missed the opportunity of a lifetime. Half of Chinqapin Parish’d give their eye-teeth to take a whacka Ouisa!
M’lynn, what’s wrong with you…did a reindeer fly up your butt or something?
M’lynn, you just missed the chance of a lifetime. Half of Chinqapin Parish would give their eye teeth to take a whack at Ouiser!
M’Lynn: I wanna just hit somethin’
Clairee: Here…hit Ouiser!!
Ouiser: What the hell???
M’Lynn: Well, the boys just brought the car around.
Shelby: What did they do to it?
M’Lynn: Let me put it this way. If you and Jackson want to practice safe sex, you’re all set.
Malin: Ouisa, call your dog, he’ll listen to you.
Ouisa:Kill, Rhett, kill!
Malynn you just missed the chance of a lifetime. Half of chickapin parish would give their eye teeth to take a whack at weezer!
Mama! This nail polish is drying way too dark. ‘Practically Pink’, it looks like a stuck pig bled all over my hand!
Mama, this nailpolish is drying up way too dark! ‘Delicate pink’, my foot, it looks like a stuffed pig bled all over my hands.
Maybe I should start having emotional outbursts more often! Maybe I should have them at home! Drum would be so pleased!
Maybe she was prayin’ for Marshall, and Drew, and Belle. Maybe she was prayin’ cuz we were gossipin’. Maybe she was prayin’ cuz the elastic’s shot in her pantyhose. Who knows! She prays at the drop of a hat these days!
Men are the worst creatures in this planet, they will make your life a living hell, mark my words!
Miss Truvy, I promise that my personal tragedy will not interfere with my ability to do good hair.
My colors are blush and bashful. Pink is my signature color.
My momma brought me up right. I haven’t left the house without spandex on these thighs since I was 14.
My name is Sammy, and this here is the best Cherry Coke in the history of the world.
No body move! I’ve lost my contact!!
Nothin like a good piece of ass
Now Ruth Robelene there’s a story for you. Her likfe has been an experiment in terror. Lost a husband in Korea and a son in Vietnam. When it comes to sufferin’ she’s right up there with Elizabeth Taylor.
Oh I’m just screaming at my husband, I can do that anytime..
Oh Spud! I’m a chain!!!
Oh!! Nobody move! Nobody move, I lost my contact!
Ooo, what are your colors? Blush and Bashful! Her colors are pink and pink. My colors are blush and bashful Mama. I have chosen two shades of pink and one is much deeper than the other.
Open, open your eyes!
Ouiser, I love you more than my luggage.
Ouiser, you sound almost chipper,… what happened today?… you run over a small child or something?
Ouiser: Walk me home. Clairee: Walk yourself home. Ouiser: You’re the one with the flashlight…walk me home. Clairee: My car is parked over there. Ouiser: I don’t want to walk into a dark house by myself..walk me home. Clairee: You know, the older you get the sillier you get. Ouiser: The older you get the uglier you get.
Ouizer, you have the handwritin’ of a serial killa
Our son. W’re so proud of him.
Owen Jenkins, now that’s a blast from the past. I haven’t heard that name in so long I’d forgotten he ever existed. Why, he left these parts when God was a boy.
People are only nice to me because I have more money than God!
Pink is my signature color.
Poor Sammy’s so confused he doesn’t know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt!
Sammy Dwayne DeSota, what is this in my frigidaire?
Sammy’s so confused he doesn’t know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt! Says he could deal with another man, but he’s havin’ trouble with the father, the son, and the holy ghost.
Sammy’s so confused he don’t know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt!!
See, in my day, you could tell by a man’s carriage and demeanor which side his bread was buttered on…
She had her choice of going to a bible camp with her Sunday school class, or to New Orleans with me and two other sinners.
She’s the first Miss Merry Christmas in history to be caught with her tinsel…down around her knees!
She’s the only miss merry christmas, who got caught with her tinsel down around her ankles!
Shelby and I agree on one thing- The Groom’s cake! It’s awful….it’s in the shape of a giant armadillo.
SHELBY DRINK THE JUICE. DRIN DRINK THE JUICE. COMMON SHELBY DRINK THE JUICE.GET MY PURSE. SHELBY YOU DIDNT BRING YOUR PURSE NOW DRINK THE JUICE. IM GONNA LEAVE. OHHH ID LOVE TO SEE YOU TRY NOW DRINK THE JUICE. PLEASE SHELBY DRINK. THERE THERE NOW THATS BETTER. THAT ONE WAS NOT BAD THAT WAS NOT BAD AT ALL. SHES ALL CAUGHT UP IN THIS WEDDING NONSENCE. THE OTHER DAY THE DOCTOR TOLD HER THAT CHILDREN ARE IMPOSSIBLE. SHES JUST WORRIED THAT JACKSON IS GIVING UP HIS ONLY CHANCE TO HAVE CHILDREN. DONT TALK ABOUT ME LIKE IM NOT HERE. OH WELL NOW WERE STARTING TO MAKE SOME SENCE. JACKSON SAID THAT WE CAN ADOPT, WE’LL BUY TEN OF THEM IF WE HAD TOO. JACKSON SOUNDS LIKE GOOD PEOPLE TO ME.
Shelby was right, it does look like a brown football helmet
Shelby! Ugh, your hair is so short.
Shelby,it looks like you’ve been driving nails up your arm.
Shelby: momma, momma, this nail polish is dryin way too dark! practically pink my foot, it looks like a stuffed pigs bled all over my hands. Ml’ynn im sure that ive got something that’ill do and if not ill send one of your brothers to get some delicate oink nail polish. Shelby: Great idea momma, i would love to see what the boys would pick out.
Shelby: Was she praying?
Truvy: Beats me, maybe she was praying for Marshall, and Drew, and Belle. Maybe she was praying for us for gossiping. Maybe she was praying because the elastic is shot in her pantyhose, who knows? She prays at the drop of a hat these days.
shelby:Dont talk about me like I’m not here
Shelby:If you dont leave me alone I’m gonna leave..M’lynn:Oh, I’d love to see you try, coroporate please!
Smile! It increases your face value!
SMILE, it increases the face value.
Smile…It increases the value of your face.
Spud’s as outgoing as ever. Last week Louis brought his girlfriend home and the nicest thing I can say about her is that all her tatoos are spelled correctly!
Thanks, Ouisa. Nothin’ like a good piece o’ ass.
That Jackson’s one big hanging man. Yes I know.
That looks like an autopsy.
That sanctuary looks like it’s been hosed down with Pepto Bismol.
That VCR alone is worth gettin’ married for.
That which does not kill us, makes us stronger…..
That’s why God invented the A&P.
The last nicest thing my husband ever did for me was back in 1972, he enclosed this carport so that I could support him..
The neighborhood would be a lot more alienated if they got covered in bird shit at my reception
The neighborhood would be a lot more alienated if they got covered in bird shit at my reception.
The older you get the sillier you get.
well the older you get, the uglier you get.
the only difference between us and the animals is our ability to accesorize!
The only reason people are nice to me is because I have more money than God.
The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize!
The only thing the separates us from the animals is our ability to accesorize.
The sanctuary looks like it’s been hosed down with Pepto Bismo!
There’s so much static electricity in this room I pick up everything but boys and money!
There’s so much static electricity in this room, I pick up everything except money and men.
There, my secret is out…I’m having an affair with a Mercedes-Benz
They were both high. They’d been smokin’ everything but their shoes!
This here is the best cherry coke in the history of the world.
This is in the freezes beautifully section of my cookbook, and I wanted to bring something that freezes beatuifully.
This is it, I’ve found it, I’m in hell.
Time marches on and sooner or later you realize it is marchin’ across your face.
Time marches on and sooner or later you realize it is marchin’ right across your face
To my new granbaby…May he be as good looking as I am!
To my new grandbaby, may he be as good lookin as I am
truvy-Ooo. those are too cha-cha for words!
Truvy: Clairee, you know Iâ€™d rather walk on my lips than criticize anybody…but…Janice Van Meterâ€¦
Clairee: I know…
Truvy: I bet you money sheâ€™s paid $500 for that dress and doesnâ€™t even bother to wear a girdle.
Clairee: Itâ€™s like two pigs fighting under a blanket.
Truvy: Well, I havenâ€™t left the house without lycra on these thighs since I was 14.
Clairee: You were brought up right.
Truvy: It’s a cup of flour, a cup of sugar, a cup of fruit cocktail with juice, and you mix and bake at 360 till gold-n-bubbly.
Clairee: Sounds awful rich!
Truvy: I know, that’s why I serve it over ice cream to cut the sweetness.
Truvy: Shelby, what are your colors?
Shelby: my colors are blush and bashful
MaLynn: her colors are pink and pink
Shelby: my colors are blush and bashful
MaLynn: Its really quite revolting, the sanctuary looks like its been hosed down in pepto-bismol
Truvy: What are ya colors, Shelby? Shelby: Their blush and bashful! Malin: Her colors are pink and pink. Shelby: My colors are blush and bashful, Mama! I have chosen 2 shades of pink, one is much deeper than the other.
Very Good Inell !!!
Spoken Like a true Smartass !!!
Wait..Nobody move…my contact!!!!
We are awful….we are hateful, awful people! All we’ve been talking about is weddings and psychotic animals.
We went skinny dippin’ and we did things that frighten fish!
Weaser: Annelle, u take ur Bible ans shove it where the sun don’t shine
Weeza: Drum! You are a boil on the butt of humanity!
Weeza: Well what am I supposed to do with this dog?
Drum: Serve him on toast.
Weezer- Eat shit and die
Weezer: Did you get those magnolias out of my tree?!
Drom: The judge has not decided whose tree that is exactly.
Weezer: It is MINE!!
Well Annele, what do you say we talk some trash?
Well done, Elnelle. Spoken like a true smart ass.
well, are you married or not? these are not hard questions
Well, if you want to practice safe sex, you’re all set.
Well, you know what I say: if you don’t have anything nice to say about anybody, come sit by me!
What if she wakes up for one second and i’m not here?
When it comes to pain and suffering, she’s right up there with Elizabeth Taylor
Who made this? Guilty, I can make just about anything- ‘cept snakes. I don’t have the counter space.
Why Weezer, you’re almost chipper today. Did you run over a small child or something?
Woman #1: All gay men are named Rick, Mark, or Steve.
Woman #2: I need to get some track lightin’.
Woman #3: Oh, I love my track lightin’.
Woman #2: When did you get track lightin’?
Woman #3: My grandson just put it in.
Woman #1: I haven’t seen him in ages. How is he?
Woman #3: Oh, Steve’s fine.
women from the south are graceful/gentle like the branches
of a magnolia tree,yet strong as steel to withstand tornados…
they are like Steel Magnolias.
What is the correct quote?
Worst, the cake part is red velveet…people are going to be hacking into this poor animal that looks like it’s bleedin’ to death!
Would it be too much to ask…for a little excitement? Not too much, I wouldn’t want you to break a sweat…
Would you call the color grape or oberjean ??
Would you call this color grape or obergine? 2. Nobody give’s a damn about that grape shit!
Would you like some Iced Tea? Its the house wine of the south!
You are a pig from HELL
You are a pig from hell!
You are a PIG from HELL!!
YOU are different Shelby! There are limits to what you can do!
You are evil and you must be destroyed!
You are too twisted for color t.v.
You are too twisted for color t.v.
You are too twisted for color Tv, Clairee! Have your roots done!
You can’t scre up her hair! You just tease it, and make it look like a brown football helmet.
You can’t screw up her hair. You just tease’ it and make it look like a brown football helmet
You have the hand writing of a serial killer.
You know I love you more than my luggage
You know I love you more than my luggage…
You know I worship the quicksand you walk on
You know what they say…if you can’t say anything nice, come sit next to me!
You know what they say? If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me!
You know, I used to think you were crazy for marrying that man. Then for a few years I thought you were a glutton for punishment. Now I know you must be on some mission from God.
You worship the quicksand i walk on.
Your a real gentleman, I bet you take the dishes out of the sink before you pee in it!
Your colors are PINK and PINK…it looks like Pepto Bismal threw up all over the alter.
~Sammy Dwayne Desota, what is this in my frigidaire?~Beer.~Well, I don’t care what you keep in your refigerator but you will not keep liquor in mine.~Aww, for Christ’s sake.~Who?~Christ.~Is that our Lord? Is that who’s name you’re taking in vain?~That’s the one!~Well I just don’t know about spending the rest of my life with someone I’m not gonna meet in the hereafter.~Aww Annelle God damn it!~Oh I think we should pray.~Aww, I’d rather eat dirt!
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Steel Magnolias’: Quotes from the movie ‘Steel Magnolias’