Movie Quotes from Reality Bites: Quotes from the movie Reality Bites

…don’t talk to her like that, she’s not a child…We’ll she married one!

1)Did he dazzle you with his extensive knowledge of mineral water or was it his in depth analysis of marky mark that justified sleeping with a cheesehead yuppy? 2)He’s not a cheesehead yuppy. 1) He’s the reason cliff’s notes were invented.

1)I am really in love with you. Is that what you wanna hear? Is it? Well, don’t flatter yourself. 2)Go to hell.

1)Is this like a pirate operation? 2)Do I look like a pirate to you?

1)You and me and 5 bucks. 2)You got it.

1)You’re overqualified for this job. 2)I’m really not that smart.

1. Mother, I have something to tell you…I’m a homosexual. 2. Oh, Christ! Is there a support group that I can join to deal with my own homophobia? 1. PFLAG…Parents and Friends of Lesbians And Gays 2. PFLAG, I like the sound of that, PFLAG.

1. What is your glitch? 2. My glitch? 1. What, did I step over the line in the sands of coolness with you?

1: Don’t Bogart that can, man…
2: Are you retarded?
1: No, I’m rhyming. It’s not easy. Sure I make it look easy…

1~I’m sorry I don’t know the secret handshake with you.
2~There’s no secret handshake. There is an IQ prerequisite.

All I want is you.

And you wonder why we never got involved? 2: January 17th, …. 1: I was totally stoned and drunk out of my mind

are you retarded?
~no, im rhyming.

At the beep please leave your name, number and a brief justification for the ontological necessity of modern man’s existential dilemma… and… we’ll get back to you

Baby, I love you.

BMW! BMW! Didn’t you listen to her speech today? She doesn’t want a BMW!

Come on, come on, come on, no lagging. Look, the Free Clinic Aids Test!

Domino’s takes checks!

Don’t Banquo that can………man.
Are you retarded?
No, I’m rhyming. It’s not easy.

Don’t bogart that can, man.

Don’t Bogart that can………man.
Are you retarded?
No, I’m rhyming. It’s not easy.

Don’t bogart that can…man!

Evian is Naive spelled Backwards

Evian is naive spelled backwards. Oooh, oooh, oooh. Could you turn that up? Please? You won’t be sorry.

french cut, v-neck, what have you

From troy, If I turn back the hours,I tell you I love you.

Get a Ford.

Good morning ladies and…and gentleman! Well, it’s gonna be a good morning with this crowd!

Good morning ladies and…gentleman! I see a gentleman right there!

He has been fired from 12–count them 12–jobs.

He lets you navigate that entire relationship. I’m sorry you can’t navigate me. I might do mean things, and I might hurt you, and I might run away without your permission and you might hate me forever and I know that scares the shit out of you because I’m the only real thing you have.

He’s so cheesy, I can’t watch him without crackers.

He’s the reason why Cliff Notes were invented.

He’s weird. He’s strange. He’s sloppy. He’s a total nightmare for women…I can’t believe I haven’t slept with him yet.

He’s weird. He’s strange. He’s sloppy. He’s a total nightmare for women… I can’t believe I haven’t slept with him yet.

Hello, you’ve reached the winter of our discontent.

Her: I just don’t understand why everything can’t go back to normal at the end of the half hour, like onthe Brady Bunch or something. Him: Well, because Mr. Brady died of AIDS.

Hey that’s my bike

I am not pretending. I am calmly reading…

I am not under any orders to make the world a better place.

I can’t, um, really define irony, but I know when I see it!

I just can’t handle this right now, I can’t evolve now.

i mean try at something for once in your life, do something about it! but ya know what you better do it now and you better do it fast, because the world doesnt owe you any favors and wether you know it or not your on the inside track to loser ville U.S.A

I think I was concieved on an acid trip.

I think this moment has been sufficiently memorexed

I truly believe that if we can get two women in the Supreme Court, we can get at least one on you, Sam.

I want first kisses, I want passion the whole way through.

I’m a non-practicing virgin

I’m bursting with fruit flavor

I’m bursting with fruit flavors.

I’m just a bell.

I’m just a bill.

I’m late for a jean folding seminar. Let’s locomote!

I’m not gonna work at The Gap, for Pete’s sake!

I’ve waited all these years to have you here like this
Me too

I, am not acting, like anything. I am calmly reading.

If we can get 2 women on the Supreme Court, we can get at least 1 on you.

In you face TV it’s like MTV but with an edge…

It’s cool Troy you can stay… welcome to the Maxi Pad.

Lelaina Pierce: I was really going to be somebody by the time I was 23.
Troy Dyer: Honey, all you have to be by the time you’re 23, is yourself.
Lelaina Pierce: I don’t know who that is anymore.
Troy Dyer: I do. And we all love her. I love her. She breaks my heart again and again. But I love her.

Lelaina Pierce? Is there a Lelaina Pierce here? 2: Um, yeah?

Lelaina: And they wonder why those of us in our twenties refuse to work an eighty hour week. Just so we can afford to buy they’re BMW’s. Why we aren’t interested in the counter-culture that they invented, as if we did not see them disembowell their revolution for a a pair of running shoes. But the question remains, what are we going to do now? How can we repair all the damage we inherited? Fellow graduates, the answer is simple. The answer is.. the answer is.. I don’t know.

Lelaina: Hey Sammy, what’s your Goal? Sammy: My Goal a career, or something.

Lelaina: Quick Vicki, what’s your social security? Vicki: Ahh..eight five one two five nine three five seven. Troy: Very impressive. Vicki: It’s the only thing I really learnt in College.

M: Is there a secret handshake with you? T: There’s no secret handshake. There’s an I.Q. prerequisite.

Melrose Place is a really good show.

Mom: You could get a job at the Burger-Rama… I saw on TV, they have a little retarded boy working the cash register! Lalaina: Because I’m not retarded, mother. I was validictorian of my class. Step-dad: Well you don’t have to put that on your resume.

Ms. Pierce, there’s a reason I’ve been here six months.

my mother goes to the bathroom with the door OPEN…’s like they’re brother and sister.

My Sharona.

No one can eat fifty eggs

Nutrasweet causes you to grow a third eye

Oh my god theyve discovered nutrasweet causes you to grow a third eye!

Oh my God! I’m so sorry! I had no idea!

Oh no! They found out nutrasweet causes you to grow a third eye!

Oh who told you that? your psychic partner? You’re high…why don’t you go outside and take a walk.

Oh would you two just do it and get it over with?! I’m starving!

Person #1: You don’t know WHAT she needs.
Person #2: I think I know what she needs in a way you never will.

PFLAG. I’m beginning to like the sound of that.

Sammy…you don’t even live here!

School’s out.

She just had too many diet cokes today

singing in a bar: I’ve got a pot head mama and a coke head dad, I’m the ultra-modern of the American man/I don’t feel good and I don’t feel bad, cause me see I’m nuthin’…

T: Hello, you’ve reached the winter of our discontent.

The Lone Star free clinic AIDS test….the ‘rite of passage’ for our generation

The pay phone outside always amazes me.

this girl is coo-coo for coco puffs!

This girl is cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs

Troy who? What was that name again? Oh! Right through the heart!

troy: what happend to your normal clothes?
michael: wow, lelaina, look at you. you look…where´d you get that
lelaina: um…i don´t know, i just bought it. but i think i´m gotta
go change…
michael: no don´t, you look beautiful. you look like…you look
troy: a doily.

Troy: What is that, like part of my lease agreement? Lelaina: It’s either that or a credit check.

Vicki: Here’s the deal, I’m gonna take Sam, against his will and straighten him out, because I truelly believe that if we can get two women on the supreme court, we can get at least one on you Sam.

Vicky, he will turn this place into a den of slack.

Vicky:It’s cool Troy, you can stay..Welcome to the Maxi Pad
Sammy: Yeah and now with new dri-weave, I hear it actually pulls moisture away from you

We’re going to eat gas!!!

We’re gonna eat gas.

Welcome to the maxi pad…2: believe it or not, it actually pulls moisture AWAY from you

Welcome to the winter of our discontent.

Well, should I get married, should I be good, should I astound the girl next door with my velvet suit and my Faustus hood and not take her to movies but to cemetaries and tell her of werewolf tongues and forked clarinets… What ‘Hey that’s my bike’ would like to do – eventually – as a band, is to travel the countryside like Woody Guthrie… But as you can see, I have the occasional run in with an anti-‘Hey that’s my bike’-er… and to all of those people I say nobody… nobody… can eat 50 eggs.

What’s money to an artist? It’s green piece of paper floating in and out of his life like snow.

what’s the trouble sugar booger?

What’s your glitch, man?

When you come back to me.

Why are you acting like a jealous boyfriend all of a sudden?

Why don’t you work at Burger Barn? They’ll hire you. Why just the other day I saw on t.v., they had a little retarded boy working the cash register.

Yeah, think about all those starving people in Africa that don’t even have cars.

You and me and ten-bucks

You got fired? That just screws up my idea of good and evil.

You look like a doily.

You’ve been waiting for this since the day we met 2: Oh, who told you that, your psychic partner?

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