Movie Quotes from Kissing a Fool: Quotes from the movie Kissing a Fool

(1) So the $64,000 question is, how do you know beforehand that you’re with the wrong person so you can avoid having them wreak havoc on a large portion of your life?
(2) I don’t think you do know until you meet the right person, ’cause then you just… you just… you just feel something that you know you’ve never felt before.

**punch in the arm**Say hi.

Cliff: LINDA! you look great! Linda: well, (haha) i showered…uh,
do i know you? Cliff: no – i’m crashing – who’s
wedding is this anyway? – so, I had the caterer move
us, we’re going to be sitting together! well this is
a great place you have here, yup yup, great place and
really nice of you to let the kids have it for the
affair….! Cliff’s fiance: oh my god, LIN, how did
they LAND your house exactly…?

Did I mention this is a convertable?!

Do you have money? It’s great. I do.

Don’t be afraid to hit that drum, a little enthusiam never hurt anyone.

Don’t you leave me you fuck’n FagGOT!

Dre: This garlic bread is GREEEAAT!

Fuck chivalry!

He’s so talented and sensitive. Did you notice that? How talented and sensitive Jay is?

How do you feel? P2: Like ten bucks.

jay, there were cameras…..! it’s going to take a fucking month to get back in there now….

Jay: No one could do it….OK, Stephen King could do it but no one else!

jay: hmmm, so, what did you kids talk about?
max: well, to be honest, i have no idea…i mean we have nothing in common and i mean NOTHING. she hates sports, i hate books…she’s travelled all over the world; the only time i’ve been out of the country is when the soxs played in tijuana….i think i love her!

Jay: I’ve SEEN the heroin look Max, GIVE ME THE
MAGAZINE…why won’t you give it to me? Max: because
– it will – upset you…you’re ripping it….you’re
ripping it….LET GO of the Magazine

Jay: O.k. What’s with the obscene phone calls? (Enter Max’s
whole story)…this is a joke right? Sam’s going to
pop in here any moment and come up with some story
about how you have a detachable penis or
something….o.k. well i have to go now, i have to get
some more pages to your sex crazed fiance….

Jay: Those were not RECORDS, they’re radio specials! Max: Uhhhh-kay!

Max, laws of a civilized society still apply
here, you can look – you just can’t touch….

Max: (beep beep) – Traded in the Benz!
….Jay:….yeah, i can see that, but what i can’t
see…are movers?!?

Max: are these the rents? Sam: the what? Max: your parents? Sam:
those are my parents! Max: uh huh. well, maybe i
should have checked out the gene pool before we moved
in together….Is that a mole on your mother’s face?

Max: when’s she leaving? Dre: not till labor day,
get used to it…. Sam: Uh, Where are you going?
Dre: The mooooviiieees! Sam: Well, Don’t have her
home too late! Max: it’s twelve noon! Dre: Bye Jay!
Max: Hey, I’d like a goodbye you brat – – – – I’m in
good with the family, you know?

MAX; i was like who am i, what am i doing here, and what is UP
with the cubs?!?!

Natasha: This is Rudolpho
Jay: You’re kidding – right?

Natasha: Pull my hair
Jay: I’m not going to pull your hair….
Natasha: PULL IT!

oh, you know, like that thing we do with the pigs…

Really? ‘Cuz you suuuuuuucked.

Sam and Jay: Il- AL – AL – Il – El – Al Gelati!
Max: What – – are you guys, doing? Sam and Jay: was
that all it was called? Yeah, i think i had a more
romantic recollection myself.

Sam: Did you love her? Jay: I don’t know. We were mostly stoned and it was hard to tell what was real and what was manufactured on getting the other one bring over the pot.

Sam: Does Max have any psychological problems i
should know about?…..Well, at first he was telling
me how great i was, and now all of a sudden he’s
telling me how great you are….I think Max thinks we
should be together….! Jay: FOUR SHOTS – VODKA!

Sam: How do you feel?
Jay: Like ten bucks.

Sam: Jay, meet my little cousin Andrea…. – Andrea: I LIKE Dre!

Sam: Jay, what are you doing? you look awful! Jay:
i’m just taking a walk. Sam: in slacks? Jay: yeah,
i’m just doing that morning walk slash jog thing…

sam: max, will you go to italy with me? max: baby,
i’d go anywhere with you, but just so you know,
they’ve got GREAT PIZZA right here in chicago, right
jay?! jay: yeah, GREAT pizza here in CHica….

That chain smoking bitch!

The $64,000 question is: how do you know beforehand that you’re with the wrong person so you can avoid letting them wreak havoc on a large portion of your life?

This is an Australian chewing stick! See college boy, I know other countries in Europe!

This is not a toothpick. This is an Australian chewing stick. See college boy, I know other countries in Europe.

True love can’t be found to where it does not truly exist. Nor can it be hidden where it truly does.

true love cannot be found where it does not truly exist, nor can it be hidden where it truly does

True love cannot be found where it does not truly exist, nor can it be hidden where it truly does.

Well, I’m thinking what with this cramped up office feel, is this really the way to go? Perhaps we could work from the comfort of our own respective spaces, your office, my apartment, and just
communicate via phone and fax.

What up, Chicago?!

What Uuuuuuu … uuuh.

When you’re buying literature for your best friend – Books on tape!

Yeah, I don’t think that dating Windy Weathers is a real attention grabber…and what does he go by now, is it Wind or Gust or….?

you know what? you’re a dick, alright! fuckin ass, fuck you!

You remember sex?


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