Movie Quotes from Kingpin: Quotes from the movie Kingpin

(1 to 2) Must be tough when you’re spankin’ your monkey.
(3 to 2) You have a monkey?

(Whole Amish town) Goodbye brother Munson, goodbye whore!

1) Can you get sick drinking piss? 2) I think you can. 1) Even if its your own?

1) How’s Life? 2) taking forever

1) I got up a little early, so I took the liberty of milking your cow.
2) We don’t have a cow. We got a bull.

listen mother teresa just because you spend most of your time in the missionary possition doesnt make you s saint.

listen Mother Teresa, just because you spend most of your time in the missionary possition doesnt make you a saint.

Alright. Just calm down alright. Take it easy, calm. Just like the kid back there. Look how… Ish.. ISH… Pull it over!

And that bowler is you Roy…

And you call yourselves a bowling alley?

Another Tanqueray and Tab?

Yeah, keep ’em coming – it’s a long drive.

Big Ern with his panash and style has done for bowling what Mohammed Ali did for boxing… Look at that ball, in my 27 years of covering bowling, I’ve never seen anything like it.

Big Ern, A million dollars. What are you going to do with it?

I dont know. All I know is, I finally got enough money…that I can buy my way out of anything. I can do anything I want when I get my money later. And I won! Finally Big Ern is above the law! Its a great feeling.

You were so cool. Any pressure?

Where are those girls? Get those girls over here. Yeah, there was pressure. I didnt want to get beat by a guy with a hook ya know.

bye brother roy, bye whore

Can you get sick from drinking piss?

Damn this Hand! Where do ya get somethin like that? Prosthetics R’ Us aisle 6 right next to the glass eye balls. It must be tough when ya spankin’ your monkey. You have a monkey!?
Hey handsome, how bout a dance? Ah, Well thank you young lovely but to tell you the truth I’m a little bit worn out. I wasn’t Askin’ you… She said Handsome not Handless.

Finally Big Ern is Above the Law!!!

Flossin’…where’d I get Munson from? THe name is Munson, what I’m doin’ is flossin’ cleans your teeth. YOu should try it some time, you’d be amazed at what you can find!

He was sniffing glue in the parking lot.

what’s so funny?
I didnt wanna say anything..but, with those narrow hips, she couldnt bare anymore than six er seven children, hehehe

Hey sweetheart, why don’t you do us a favor? Wash off that perfume before you come back to my table.

Hi……not you………Hi

Not you. Hi.

how about new beginings? what is that some kind of new feminine hygiene spray.

How dare you move in on my score. i ought to stoot slap your ass

I don’t know, this doesn’t feel right. You sure this is legal? Big ern-ha,I don’t know…..sure is fun though isn’t it?

I don’t puke when I drink, I puke when I don’t!

Its a small world when you got unbelievable tits roy

its a small world when you have such amazing tits roy

Looks like the angels are bowling. Maybe they’ll send us a messenger.

most of the outfits you got you need two hairdo’s to wear!

most of the outfits you have you need two hairdo’s to wear!

Munson: Shh…be quiet!! Aww crap, I think I skinned both my nutsacks!
Ishmail: Mr. Munson. Are you okay?
Munson: Ish..what did I just say?!!??
Ishmail: I think I skinned both my nutsacks?

my little Roy Toy

OK my friend, my so-called friend, make your spare….Or miss it!!!!!!

park the shit box and come with me

Put that in a bottle ‘n you got somethin’ sweeter than YooHoo

Roy you know for the first couple of years I felt it was my fault

Roy: Hey, I hope you don’t mind, I got up a little early, so I took the liberty of milking your cow for you. Yeah, it took a little while to get her warmed up, she sure is a stubborn one, whew.
[Takes a drink from the bucket]
Mr. Boorg: We don’t have a cow…..We have a bull.
Roy: I’m gonna go brush my teeth now.

Roy:You two know each other. Ernie:It’s a small world, when you have unbelievable tits, Roy.

sometimes i wake up and Big Ern is already there

Speak of the Devil and she appears. I’m gonna play the juke box.

Sweeter than yooho.

Take that ya freaky piece a shit…ya dont mow another guys lawn!!


That womans a stone-faced liar. I pulled out way early.

The sound of silence.

ugh my little roy toy

We don’t have a cow, we have a bull!

We don’t have a cow…We do have a bull though. I think I am going to go brush my teeth.

whaat is it about good sex that makes me have to crap. maybe it’s all that pumping. pump and dump. you still owe me another months rent, so if i were you i’d start doing some tongue exersises before friday.

What is it about good sex that makes me have to crap? you really jarred something loose tiger.

What is it about sex that makes me have to crap. You really jarred something loose tiger.


Why don’t you go blow lunch, or do whatever it is you do to keep that ass of yours in business.

Wow, its kinda humbling being in the presence of so many great athletes.

You just got beat by a club player! That’s not suppose to happen, you’re carrying a 275 average!
Well, what do you expect with you and your ten frames!

You’re on a gravy train with biscuit wheels!

Your act is about as fresh as a foghat concert

your on a gravy train with bisket wheels, why do you want to throw it lall away.

[Ishmel] What are you talking about?[Munson] You know, it’s round and you stick three fingers in it.[Ishmel]You keep miss mary outta this!

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