Movie Quotes from Guru, The: Quotes from the movie Guru, The

1. Can you get to the Bronx in 15 minutes? 2. I’m a cab-driver, I can get to Bombay in 15 minutes.

1. You know, I’m sick of your fucking materialism. 2. Yeah, well I’m sick of your fucking sented oils. You smell like a Bombay hooker.

What is this? I ordered chicken tikka masala. That is chicken tikka masala sir. That is not chicken tikka masala sir. That is definately chicken tikka masala. Dude, I know chicken tikka fucking masala, and that’s not it- so how ’bout you take your skinny brown ass down to the kitchen and go get me some. Yes sir, I’m sorry- dude.

And like roses are meant to open- so must you. You must open your rosebud.

Dance is like love. Join me- follow your inner beat.

Do you know why they call it the American Dream? Because it only happens when you’re asleep.

get comfortable in your naked costume

Im gonna meditate on that


Not long ago, a wise man told me that all people care about is sex, and money, and opera. Now, myself- I don’t have any money, because I’m a swami, and swamis don’t like opera… well, because you cant dance to it. So I will talk to you about sex.

Now the rent goes down!

Skip. Skrew. Happy. Got it.

This is Amit, he’s a nerd… that’s Sanjeev, he’s illegal.

Yoou’re the one that I want.

Your naked body is like a costume that you wear to be yourself. Be comfortable in your nakedness. The most powerful sexual organ God gave you is your brain. Think about it- are you thinking?

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