Movie Quotes from Encino Man: Quotes from the movie Encino Man

(link jumps off the stairs) Stoney: Link hows ur melon bud-dy.

1)Betty. 2)Betty? 1)Betty. Betty Nuggs. 2)Betty Nuggs?

18 inch bi’s…..mine are only 4 -Stoney

1: He melted 2:Dave it wasn’t ment to happen come on I’ll go buy you some ho-ho’s

1:David going somewhere? 2: Ya I got a date with your mom

1:Do you wanna be a man essa? 2: evantualy look i’am almost there look at my patch bro…this is tequilla right? Where’s the worm? 2:the worm’s right there essa 1: uh uh Iam a weasel 2:do wanna be a man weasel? do wanna be a man essa?

1:I mean it’s not enough I want my own page in the yearbook 2:Jump off the gym splatter on the street and go for the co-ver 1:that’s not funny, Iam not going down as some geek kid from Encino, when I finnish this pool Iam going to have the killer party after the prom, Iam going to be prom king, and iam going to graduate a ledgend.. 2:but what about me? 1:oh well you’ll be there to 2:thanks

1:Link and I had a stoney time at the mountain 2: are you crazy? you took him to mega mountain!?!? 1: ya cause there riding the vapour in reverse. 2: really cool

1:What’s my mom screaming about? 2:She’s bumed cause I snaked her last bagel

1:Ya know Mr.M the way I look at it someday me and your daughter will get married and we will be related 2: I count the days

1:You gotta help me dig em out, look you were here your part of it 2: I dont wanna be a part of anything Iam just happy to be me 1:It could mean money, you tell me you couldn’t use a new scooter, some new bellbottom’s, a little fundage weez some older nugs with a mansion and a pool, soaking up the rays, watching all the je-pardy you can handle 2:that was the clincher 1:everybody’s got a price 1:come on

?: u can drop him off in front of blades tonite right. Stoney: o wait can Dave and i come too. ?: u smell. (stoney gets hit) Stoney: hey signorita that hurt my lope i didnt do it they started the whole thing.

Ahhhhhh Daaaave!

All the Jeop-or-dy you can handle.

All you care about is nugging, grinding, and weazing.

All you care about is nugs, chillin’ and grindage.

All you ever cared about is nugs, chillin and grindge.

Are you telling me you couldn’t use a, a new scooter? some new bell-bottoms? a little fun-dage? wease off some older nugs with a mansion and a pool, soakin’ up rays, watchin’ all the jeop-ardy you can handle…


can i tell Steve Coozer?

Chaeck out fresh nugs. weezin the juice. owwww bud-dy

check out fresh nuggs, weezin the juice, ahhh ooooh bu-ddy, checkout my cap.

Computer club, computer club

Computer club, computer Club!!!!

Dave: stop where did u go? u just took off after school, u kno how worried i’ve been? Stoney: u sound like my mom. Dave: u cant do that to me. whats on his nose? Stoney: Chill Dave cuz Link and I had a stoney time up at the mountain. Dave: u took him to mega mountain r u crazy? Stoney: yea cuz their ridin The Vapor in reverse. Dave: they r? Stoney: mmmhmm. Dave: o cool. Link: check out fresh nugs, weazin the juice owwwwwww bud-dy, check out my cat owww. Dave: o no u got him talkin like u now. Link&Stoney: Owwwwwwwww.

Dave: u know they never found jimmy haffa. or ____ mahoney. Stoney: or Jimmy Mahoney. a kid in my cub scouts.

El queso es viejo y petrido. Donde esta el sanitarios?


Figures, hot on the outside, icy cold in the middle.
Two minutes

four wheelin over the ferns.

he needs a bath big time

hey buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuddddddddyyyyyyyyyy!

I am Stoney the crusty dude

I don’t know you, I don’t like you and as of now I’m all over you.

I know you, I don’t like you, and as of right now-i am all over you –Matt Wilson

i love it when she calls me David

I think he’s tracking a fly.

I’m a stoney-crusty dude. Didja know that?

I’m not a geek, I’m a unique weasel!

I’m not a nerd! I’m a weasel!

I’ve got the radest deoderant on, dude. Smell my pits.

if you edged cos im weizzing of your grindage just chill, coz if I had the WHOLE bradey bunch thing happen at my pad i’d go crash over there so don’t tax my gig so handcore cruster

Its your cave nug.

link your probably used to eatin twigs,but here in the USA we have what you call the 4 basic food groups(link picking up a banana)and link this is not one of um.fist group the dairie group,milk duds,you hide these under your pillow so your mom doesnt find them if she does your tweaked bro.second group,fruit gruop,sweet tarts,these are outratisally citrusy.keep rollin.third group vegatible group,corn nuts,man you buy these by the pound.(DING)meat group!these are my favorite (link biting into).hey!equil,equil, 50-50.ok, now for drinks,slurpees.this is what put this place on the map bro.(chugging slurpee from machine)(storeclerk)mr.stoney!dont do that here!(stoney)kashmer,rasmmere why dont you just you chill ok cause were going to the mountain and we decided before we go wed weez the ju-ice.(second storeclerk)no butts chill!get out of my store!(stoneylink leave)(link goes back in store w/sunglasses on)ill be back.(link leaves)(storeclerk)no butts chill!

Look David please do me a favour and stress less bro, high school is over buddy get into it were loo-zers.

Look, Mr. Morgan if ur edgin cuz i’m weazin on ur grindge, just chill. cuz if i had the whole brady bunch thing happenin at my pad i’d go grind over there so dont tax my gig so hardcore cruster

Lose the Geek Squad, they’re bad for your deal.

Meat Group!

Mr. Morgan, If you’re edged cuz im weezin all your grindage, just chill.. cuz if i had the whole brady bunch thing goin on over at my pad, id go grind over there, so dont taxt my gig so hardcore cruster.

No but still

No weezing the juice.

Oh my God, you got him talking like you now

Oh ooo bud-dy!

Oww! You hurt my lobes!



School is like, a harsh ride! Ah…Ah..Ahhh…ah


Shoe fly don’t bother, me shoe fly dont bother me, shoe fly don’t bother me, cause you belong to my friend Link, good catch,…meat group!

Shoo fly, don’t bother me… Shoo fly, don’t bother me… Shoo fly don’t bother me, ’cause you belong to my friend Link. (snap) MEAT GROUP!

Shoo fly, don’t bother me… shoo fly, don’t bother me… shoo fly, don’t bother me… ’cause you belong to my friend Link.


So don’t tax my gig so hard-core, cruster.

Spanish is like, Guacamole, Chips and Salsa (fart)

Stoney is the crustiest va-to, I’ve ever wit-nessed.

Stoney is the crustiest Vato I’ve ever wit-nessed so don’t harsh his gig bud-dy Oooooooooooowwwwwwww!!

stoney-kashmere,rashmere how many minutes for the burito again. kashmere-1 minute. rashmere-2 minute. kashmere-1 1/2 minute. stoney-ahh make up your mellons is it 1 or 2? kashmere-1 1/2 minute.

Stoney: Bud-dy

Stoney: But David, I am popular! David: Yeah, you travel in large groups of one

Stoney: feel it dave it’s chillin,its not chillin chillin, i mean its really chillin. Dave: i know it’s cold.

Stony is the crustiest vato I’ve ever witnessed! So, don’t harsh his gig buddy… ow owowoow!

The cheese is old and moldy

the cheese is old and moldy

Those are desperate words of a loser, maybe Matt Wilson was right about you all along

To chill or not to chill, that’s the question.

We go to high school, you know, high school

Weasin’ the ju-uice, bud-dy!

what is he doing? I think he is stalking a fly. GULP. MEAT GROUP

what you did was pretty cool oh who cares about cool right right well there was really one cool thing i wanted to show you what? this Daves kisses Robion

Wheeze the juice!


Yeh i gotta match. My ass to yur face!

you know your right.She’s not worth it esay!

you see that woman over there? you see her, you see her. DON’T BE LOOKING AT MY WOMAN ESSAY!

Your mum’s really bummed cause I sneaked her last bagel.

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