Movie Quotes from Catch-22: Quotes from the movie Catch-22

1): We’re gonna come out of this war rich! 2): You’re gonna come out rich. We’re gonna come out dead.

Actor1: Nately died a wealthy man. He had over sixty shares in the syndicate. Actor2: What difference does that make? He’s dead. Actor1: Then his family will get it. Actor21: He didn’t have time to have a family. Actor1: Then his parents will get it. Actor2: They don’t need it, they’re rich. Actor1: Then they’ll understand.

Actor1: Those bastards are trying to kill me. Actor2: No one is trying to kill you sweetheart. Now eat your dessert like a good boy.

Actor1: [Over the radio] Help him! Help him! Actor2: Help who? Actor1: Help the bombardier! Actor2: I’m the bombardier, I’m all right. Actor1: Then help HIM, help HIM!

Anyone who wants to get out of combat isn’t really crazy, so I can’t ground him.

Chocolate covered cotton.

Colonel): You’re a disgrace. I’d like to know how you got to be a Captain, anyway. Captain): You promoted me. Colonel): That has got nothing to do with it!

Dad, I don’t think your allowed to take someone out and shoot them.

Dobbs): Look Yossarian, suppose, I mean just suppose everyone thought the same way you do. Yossarian): Then I’d be a damn fool to think any different.

First Sgt Towser:Sir, You can only see the Major when he is not in. Incredulous Captain Tapman:You mean I can only see the Major when he’s not in? Towser: Thats Right Sir. Tapman: well when can I see him. Towser: When he is in, he’s not there and you can’t see him, and when he’s out – Then you can see him – except that he’s not there.

I plan to live forever, or die trying

If he wants to receive a medal with no clothes on…

Italy will last forever because its so weak.

Let me see if I’ve got this straight: in order to be grounded, I’ve got to be crazy and I must be crazy to keep flying. But if I ask to be grounded, that means I’m not crazy any more and I have to keep flying.

Mom, his name is Yossarian.

Nurse Ducketts love fulcrum.

Onlookers:Get out Doc! Get out Doc! Poor Doc Daneeka! Doc Daneeka:I’m right here and I’m OK ! Onlookers:Get out Doc! Poor Doc Daneeka!

Some days I just declared war on adverbs.

Take him out and shoot him.

TAPMAN: It’s not necessary to call me Father, sir. KORN: Father, I’m a Colonel, Correct? TAPMAN: Yes sir. KORN: And you are a Lieutanant, correct so far? TAPMAN: Yes sir. KORN: Then I guess I can call you any damn thing I please, Right *FATHER* ?

The next man that moans will be taken out and shot!

The only friend I had was Snowden and I didn’t know him.

They can do anything we can’t stop them from doing.

We just want you to like us.

What are you laughing at you fucking slut?

When the Germans come I am fanatically pro-German and when the Americans come I am fanatically pro-American.

Where’s the bombadier? Where’s the bombadier?

you can’t let crazy people tell you if you’re crazy or not

You crazy, you can’t marry me because I’m not a virgin.

You did what? You arranged to bomb our own base !!

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