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Here are some of Rita Rudner’s Jokes and Sayings:
Marriages don’t last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.
I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor’s office was full of portraits by Picasso.
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
To attract men, I wear a perfume called “New Car Interior.”
To read the rest, go to: Top 25 Funny Rita Rudner Jokes, Quotes sayings and one-liners