Daily Quick Break: January 1, 2008: Funny No Respect One Liners by Rodney Dangerfield

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“I don’t get no respect.” Rodney Dangerfield made a career of these funny no respect one liners and jokes. It’s sad this crazy younger generation is growing up without the image of Rodney Dangerfield adjusting his tie and proclaiming “I get no respect, NO RESPECT I tell ya!” To get a feel for his stage character and to watch an enjoyably stupid and funny movie, rent “Back to School”. Here are some of his more famous “No Respect” one liners. A few of these might have been embellished or updated by admirers and imitators over the years, but the genre was definitely invented by the late Rodney Dangerfield, whom was, strangely enough, very respected by comedians and entertainers everywhere.

With my wife I don’t get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to ‘the best woman a man ever had.’ The waiter joined me.

I’m not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.

I tell you, I’m not a sexy guy. I was the centerfold for Playgirl magazine. The staples covered everything!

What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me!

I tell ya when I was a kid, all I knew was rejection. My yo-yo, it never came back!

When I was a kid I got no respect. The time I was kidnapped, and the kidnappers sent my parents a note they said, “We want five thousand dollars or you’ll see your kid again.”

I tell ya, my wife was never nice. On our first date, I asked her if I could give her a goodnight kiss on the cheek – she bent over!

To read the rest, go to: Funny No Respect One Liners by Rodney Dangerfield

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