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(1)We’re from Wisconsin. (2)Yeah, and I’m from my dad’s penis. Get outta here. (1)Write down my number, it’s 555-6321, got it? (2) Yeah. Wait a minute, 5-5-5’s not a real number, they only use that in the movies. (1)No shit, honey. What do you think this is, real life? (name), we just needed to be … Read more

I am a red stupid faggot Thank you. I always fancied myself a singer. I was almost in a bus and truck show of West Side Story. They said I wasn’t right for Maria. What do they know? I feel pretty. This velvet painting of Elvis. I didn’t really want it. But (BING) it’s mine! … Read more

(Display Console) Sined … Seeled … Delivered! B: Let her out … and give her your coat. P: Why me? B: Because you’re perfect. (pause)P: You’ve got a point. Bigbooty, more power to him. Bigbootay! Curse you, Big Bootie! Declaration of war: the short form … General: I’m barely holding my fudge right now. He’ll … Read more