Movie Quotes from Yellowbeard: Quotes from the movie Yellowbeard

-Mansell? Are you hit?
-No sir.

1: Betrayin’s all part of piratin’. If you don’t know that you’re not even close to being a pirate, Prawn of my loins, my foot!
2: What?
1: You’re either born a pirate or not! It’s in the blood Dan, and it’s not in your blood or you’d have betrayed me long ago!

1: I may be blind, but I have acute ‘earing.
2: I’m not interested in your jewellery.

1: I’m sure I killed the last one I raped, it can’t have been you.
2: Well, the afterplay was a bit on the rough side, but not fatal dear.

1: Where’s the map?!
2: What map?
1: If you say you don’t know where it is, I’ll nail your tits to the table!

1: Who is this guy?
2: He brought me up, just like a father.
1: oh, you mean he’s beaten ya and kicked ya and smashed ya in the teeth?

1: you know just before you went to Jail we was having a cuddle 2: i was raping ya if thats what ya mean. 1: well half cuddle, half rape.

Actor1:It sounded as though there was a bit of a squabble. Actor2:Squabble?? They’re all dead! Actor1:Must of been more of a tiff then.

Actress:When little Dan was 2 minutes old, I tatooed it on his head. Actor:Does he know about this? Actress:Oh, no no no, that’s why I kept him in the cupboard for three years. That may be why he’s a bit odd with all these books, and reading, and stuff like that.

Are you mad, woman? I haven’t got fruit in me loins! Lice, yes, and proud of ’em.

Dieing’s the easy way out. They’ll have to kill me before I die!

He will be the last in the attack, and the first to escape. Huh, Typical leaders for you.

I’ll kill anybody who gets in the way of my killing somebody

I’m going to make you eat both your own buttocks

I’m gonna make you eat both your own buttocks!

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s learning things never taught me nuthin’. And books is the worst.

it must be an awlful burden all these years being the only one who knows where the treasure is. why dont you share the burden with a friend

It would ooze alot, heads do, but I can live with that.

It’s been twenty years since we had a little cuddle, and what do you do? Come in and give me a kiss? No, you rush in and hack a hole in the wall.

Mansell:That wasn’t strictly true, was it sir? Commander:No Mansell, it’s what we in the Britich Navy refer to as…..a lie.

Read, read, read. Last time I read a book I was raped. Let that be a lesson to you.

She couldn’t be your mother. No woman ever slept with me and lived.

Stop that man pissin’ on the hedge. It’s imported!

The fat one sitting on the throne is the Queen

The pirate Yellowbeard captured many other galleons, killing over five-hundred men in cold blood. He would tear the captains hearts out and swallow them whole. Often forcing his victims to eat their own lips, he was caught and imprisoned… for tax evasion.

Three shillings for a lump of shit?

Us Yellowbeards are never more dangerous than when we’re dead.

With your head on my shoulders we could wreck civilization!

YB: A son? Takes after me does he? By the time I was 20 I’d killed 500 men in cold blood.
MB: well, he’s not quite so extraverted as you, he’s a…
YB: A Pirate!
MB: no he’s a…
YB: A Murderer!
MB: no …
YB: A Rapist!
MB: He’s a gardner.
YB: A gardner! A Yellowbeard gardening. I’ll see about that when I’m out I will.

YELLOWBEARD:Who is this guy? DAN:He brought me up,just like a father.
YELLOWBEARD:Oh,you mean he’s beaten ya,and kicked ya,and smashed ya in the teeth DAN:No,he was kind and gentle. YELLOWBEARD:What kind of
father is that?

You won’t catch me dying. They’ll have to kill me before I die!

You’ll never kill anyone if you go around thinking!

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