MARTY: Now during the flower people period, who was your drummer? DAVID: Stumpy’s replacement…Peter James Bond….He also died under mysterious circumstances…we were playing a jazz-blues festival- NIGEL: Blues-jazz really. And uhh it was tragic really…he exploded on stage…..DEREK: just like that. NIGEL: It was just like a flash of green light —and that was it. Nothings left. DAVID: Well…there was- NIGEL: Its true its true there was a little green globule on his drum seat. DAVID: Its like a stain really… NIGEL: It was a stain not a globule actually. DAVID: Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year, its just not really widely reported.
–Do you have any artificial plates or limbs?
–Er, not really.
–The Boston gig has been cancelled.
–What?
–Yeah. I wouldn’t worry about it though. It’s not a big college town.
–The sustain, listen to it.
–I don’t hear anything.
–Well, you would though. If you were playing.
–This tasteless cover is a good indication of the lack of musical invention within. The musical growth of thisband cannot even be charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry.
–That’s just nitpicking, isn’t it?
–We’re lucky.
–Yeah.
–I mean, people should be envying us, you know.
–I envy us.
–Yeah.
–I do.
–Me too.
1- Can I raise a practical question atthis point? 2- sure. 1- Does this mean we’re not going to play Stonehenge tomorrow night? 2- NO WE’RE NOT GOING TO PLAY FUCKING STONEHENGE!
1.He died in a bizarre gardening accident.
2. Authorities said… best leave it… unsolved.
1: Well, I suppose I could work in a shop of some kind or… or do um… freelance… selling of some sort of… um… product, you know…
2: A salesman, you think you…
1: A salesman, like, mabye in a haberdasher, or maybe like a… um, a chapeau shop, or something… you know, like: ‘Would you… what size do you wear, sir?’ and then you answer me.
2: Uh… seven and a quarter.
1: ‘I think we have that…’, you see, something like that I could do.
2: Yeah… you think you’d be happy doing something like—
1: ‘No! We’re all out, do you wear black?’, see, that sort of thing, I think I could probably muster up.
2: Yeah, do you think you’d be happy doing that?
1: Well, I don’t know, wh-wh-what are the hours?
NIGEL: There’s a problem here, I don’t even know where to start. IAN: Sound check? NIGEL: No no no no, look- look this- this miniature bread, its like, I’ve been working with this for about a half an hour now- I can’t figure out…You’ve got this- IAN: You’d like bigger bread? NIGEL: Exactly! I don’t understand how… IAN: You could just fold it though… NIGEL: Well no, then its half the size IAN: Fold the meat. NIGEL: Yeah then it breaks apart like this. IAN: Well, no put it on the bread like this…see? NIGEL: But then if you keep folding it it keeps breaking.. IAN: Why would you keep folding it? NIGEL: Everything has to be folded- and then its this, and I don’t want this, I want large bread so that I can put this, so then its like this, but then this doesnt work, cuz then its all- IAN: Cuz it hangs out like that… NIGEL: Look, would you be holding this? IAN: No I wouldn’t want to eat that. NIGEL: Alright exhibit A, then we move onto this- look- look who’s in here, no one, and then in here theres a little guy. Its a complete catastrophy! IAN: No, no you’re right. NIGEL: No really, its no big deal, its a joke, its a joke. IAN: I really don’t want it to affect your performance. NIGEL: Its not going to affect my performance, don’t worry about it alright…it does disturb me, but I rise above it, I’m a professional.
As long as there’s, you know, sex and drugs, I can do without the rock and roll.
Big bottom, big bottom.
Talk about mud flaps, my baby’s got ’em.
Certainly, in the topsy-turvy world of heavy rock, having a good solid piece of wood in your hand is often useful.
Certainly, in the topsy-turvy world of heavy rock, having agood piece of wood in your hand is often useful.
Currently residing in the -where are they now- file….
Do me a favor. Just kick my ass, okay? Kick this ass for a man, that’s all. Kick my ass. Enjoy. Come on. I’m not asking, I’m telling with this. Kick my ass.
Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It’s just not really widely reported.
Fuck the napkin!
Have a good time, all the time.
He died in a bizarre gardening accident some years back.
He died in a tragic gardening accident…Authorities said…it’s best to leave it unsolved.
Hello. My name is Marty DeBergi. I’m a filmmaker. I made a lot of commercials…
Here lies David St. Hubbins… and why not?
Here lies David St. Hubbins……and…why not?
I believe virtually everything I read. And I think that is what makes me more of a selective human than someone who doesn’t believe anything.
I feel like a preserved moose
I think mine would look better in dubly.
I think that the problem might have been that we had a Stonehenge monument that was in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.
I, for one, do not think the problem was that the band was down. I think that the problem may have been that there was a Stonehenge monument on the stage that was in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.
In ancient times, hundreds of years before the dawn of history, an ancient race of people… the Druids. No one knows who they were or what they were doing…
It’s an unusual name, well, he was an unusual saint, he’s not a very well known saint. He was the patron saint of quality footwear.
It’s like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water.
It’s like, how much more black could this be? And the answer is none. None more black.
It’s such a fine line between stupid, and clever.
MARTY: Now during the flower people period, who was your drummer? DAVID: Stumpy’s replacement…Peter James Bond….He also died under mysterious circumstances…we were playing a jazz-blues festival- NIGEL: Blues-jazz really. And uhh it was tragic really…he exploded on stage…..DEREK: just like that. NIGEL: It was just like a flash of green light —and that was it. Nothings left. DAVID: Well…there was- NIGEL: Its true its true there was a little green globule on his drum seat. DAVID: Its like a stain really… NIGEL: It was a stain not a globule actually. DAVID: Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year, its just not really widely reported.
MARTY: Your first drummer was… DAVID: John Stumpy Pepys..great great, tall blond geek with glasses..good drummer greak look dood drummer…. MARTY: What happened to him? DAVID: He died…he died in a bizarre gardening accident …some years back. NIGEL: It was really one of those things – it was – you know the authorities said you know best leave it–unsolved really. MARTY: And he was replaced by uh.. NIGEL: Stumpy Joe…Eric Stumpy Joe Childs. MARTY: And what happened to Stumpy Joe? DEREK: Its not very pleasant story…but uh, he died, uh he choked on uh, the official explaination was he choked on vomit… NIGEL: It was actually -it was actually someone else’s vomit…you know there’s no real… DEREK: Well they can’t prove whose vomit it was…they don’t have the ability…theres no way of… NIGEL: You can’t really dust for vomit…
May I start by saying how thrilled we are to have you here. We are such fans of your music and of all your records. I’m not speaking of yours personally, but the whole genre of the rock and roll.
Maybe I could be a surgeon.
Mime is time.
Money talks and bullshit walks.
NIGEL: Well I suppose I could work in a shop of some kind or do uh… freelance selling of some sort of product. MARTY: A salesman… NIGEL: A salesman like, maybe in a habadasher. Or maybe like uh, a chapeau shop or something. You know, like…Would you…what size do you wear, sir? And then you answer me. MARTY: Uh… seven and a quarter. NIGEL: I think we have that. See, something like that I could do. MARTY: Yeah. You think you’d be happy doing something like- NIGEL: No- we’re all out. Do you wear black?’ See, that sort of thing I think I could probably muster up. MARTY: Yeah. Do you think you’d be happy doing that? NIGEL: Well I don’t know- what are the hours?
Oh, yeah, I’ve got two hands.
Oh- ALL girls school. That makes more sense. You see, we thought you said TALL girls school, which would make us look small in the video. But this way it would make us look masculine.
Quite exciting this video magic!
Sex-IST. More than sexy
Sh! Don’t talk while it’s ringing. You defeat the whole purpose.
Slime molds are so close to being both plant and animal that it’s like they can’t make up their minds. And they’re thinking now that maybe it’s – this is who’s been running the earth all this time.
So, what’s wrong with being sexy?
So, you’ve come to replug our life support systems in?
Standing on the side of that railroad track…waiting for that train to bring you back…bring you back…if she…if she’s not on that 519 then I’ll know what sorry means and I’m gonna’ cry, cry cry all the way home……all the way home…..all the way home.
The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven. Well, it’s one louder, isn’t it? It’s not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You’re on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you’re on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where? Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do? Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
The official explanation was he choked on vomit.
the question is, how much more black can it get? and the answer is none… none more black.
There’s such a fine line between stupid and clever
These all go to eleven.
They see us on stage with tight trousers. We’ve got, you know, armadillos in our trousers. I mean, it’s really quite frightening, the size.
They were still booing him when we came on stage.
They’re bread eaters, mainly.
Thirty-seven people have been in this band over the years.
this is my exact inner structure done in a tee-shirt
this is my exact inner structure done in a tee-shirt, if you were to open me up this is what you would see.
–but its not green like that is it?
–well, yeah, yeah it is
–but your insides aren’t green
–well maybe its not exact….anyway, i wear this to sleep sometimes
This is our monthly At Ease weekend. It gives us a chance to let our hair down, although I see you’ve got a head start in that department. I shouldn’t talk, though, I’m getting a little shaggy myself. I’d better not stand too close to you, people might think I’m part of the band. I’m joking, of course.
This pretentious ponderous collection of religious rock psalms is enough to prompt the question, ‘What day did the Lord create Spinal Tap, and couldn’t he have rested on that day too?’
This twisted old fruit….
I’m just as God made me.
We are Spinal Tap from the U.K.,
and you must be the USA!!!!!!!
We’ve got armadillos in our trousers. It’s really quite frightening.
Well so what, whats wrong with being sexy?
well whats wrong with being sexy?
Well, I don’t really think that the end can be assessed as of itself as being the end because what does the end feel like? It’s like saying when you try to extrapolate the end of the universe, you say, if the universe is indeed infinite, then how – what does that mean? How far is all the way, and then if it stops, what’s stopping it, and what’s behind what’s stopping it? So, what’s the end, you know, is my question to you.
Well, I’m sure I’d feel much worse if I weren’t under such heavy sedation.
Well, that was just a two word review; it just says ‘shit sandwich’.
Well, this piece is called Lick My Love Pump.
What we’re saying is *Love your brother* Well we don’t literally say it. We don’t literally mean it.
You can’t print that!
You can’t really dust for vomit.
You can’t really dust for vomit.
You don’t do heavy metal in Dubly, you know.
You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like – I’m really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it’s sort of in between those, really. It’s like a Mach piece, really. It’s sort of – Well, this piece is called Lick My Love Pump.
You like this? This is my exact inner structure, done in a tee shirt. Exactly medically accurate. See?
[Tagline] __ Does for rock ‘n’ roll what The Sound Of Music did for hills
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘This IS Spinal Tap’: Quotes from the movie ‘This IS Spinal Tap’
