let me guess miss your mom dad, brother, dog, boyfriend. practically everything yo can think of back home ami right? how’d u know that? here sit down let me tell you a little story. this is fred. oh my god u were such a nerd! im im sorry. its k. what happeneD? well i grew the dew, guzzled some brew. this is college life man, how many years have you been here? 6 but ive majored in almost everything
(in the pantry)
1)Walter, we have to something about this.
2)Alright, you distract him, I’ll hit him over the head with a shovel.
(when the two lesbians are kissing:)
…dad….dad…do you have your camera handy?
-Do you believe in the tooth fairy? -No. -I wouldn’t fall asleep tonight if I were you. -MMMOOOOOMMMM!!!! -Sssshhhh! Dude, I was just kidding. Sshhh. Chill.
1) I want something feminine 2) he’s standing right next to me
1) Maybe now’s a good time to talk about the rules in my room. 2) Rules? 1) Rule number 1, Dont touch anything… 2) and whats rule number 2? 1) there’s only one rule, DONT TOUCH ANYTHING!!!
1) So I didn’t bone her?
2) So he didn’t bone me?
3) So you guys didn’t bone?
1)Crawl, what are you wearing? Chaps?
1)No, I hates.
1)Sing it, Becca — How do you feed a hungry man?
2)I’m gonna go finish packing.
1. How many years have you been here? 2.Six. But hey I’ve majored in almost everything.
1.Are you inbred? 2.Excuse me? 1. You know, when your mom’s your dad and your dad’s your brother.
1.Dude, right after you bailed, I popped your daughter’s trunk! 2.Oh, shit.
After you left I popped your daughters trunk
Are you Bartles or James?
Buff the wood. bubbbbbbbbf the wood.
theo looks like its miller time. hey dude you should be drinking lite.
Its a miricle!
1-So you wanna stay engaged? 2- please 3-can i at least get some tongue?
Does it hurt? Its better than a kick in the face with a golf shoe.
the ink sinks into his system and the guys freaked out.
can i get a screwdriver? no i ran out of vodka
Can I please whittle wood with you?
Can I widdle wood with you
Can I wood a wood with you?
Connie: She’s obviously made up her mind, so let’s just handle this like mature adults.
Walter: Right, right… you distract him, and I’m gonna hit him in the head with a shovel.
Crawl: Old McWalter had a farm. e i e i oo. and on this farm he had a kid with squishy puppy cheeks
Crawl: Old McWalter had a farm. e i e i oo. and on this farm he had a kid with squishy puFFy cheeks
Crawl: Where are you from?
Becca: South Dakota
Crawl: Fresh off the farm, oh my God, I can’t believe it. Hallelujah. So you’re inbred?
Crawl: You know, where your mom’s your dad, and your dad’s your brother.
Crawl: You have got charisma!
Becca: What’s that?
Crawl: It’s a special quality of leadership that inspires allegiance and devotion.
Cuttin’ some corn, cuttin’ some corn, can I get some butter please?
Don’t say shut up!
don’t worry sir, after you bailed, i popped your daughters trunk!
Dude, Bartles or James, which one are you?
Ease up on the steroids, juice’ll make the jewels shrivel into sun dried tomatoes
Ease up on the steroids, the juice will make the jewels shrivvle like sun dried tomatoes…
Give your roommate a BIG kiss for me…IN THE SHOWER!
Grew the do. Guzzled some brew.
Hey, Bec! Check it out! Steven Tyler pj’s!!
I don’t mean to be mean, Mrs.Warner, but you’re givin me a semi!
If I had to choose between dying and him kissing me, I’d rather die.
If it’s a choice between dying and having him (Crawl) kiss me, I’d rather die.
If it’s between him kissin’ me or me dyin’, I’d rather die.
if your gal is finger lickin come on do the funky chicken
If your gal is finger lickin’ come on now and do the funky chicken!
Im cutting some corn. Im cutting some corn. Can i have some butter please?
Let’s just get the rules straight here. There’ll be absolutely no partying in this hall between the hours of 5 and 6 in the morning, without my express written permission. OK cool. Carry on.
Let’s just get the rules straight here. There’ll be absolutely no partying in this hall between the hours of 5 and 6 in the morning, without my express written permission. OK, cool. Carry on.
Look Becca!! Steven Tyler pj’s….Steven Tyler pj’s!
Looks like somebody’s gonna need a lot of food stamps!
Middle America, ripping the fields!
Miller time huh Theo? Dude, you should be drinkin light.
Mr. Morgan if you’re edged ‘cuz I’m weezing on your grindage just chill ‘cuz if I had the whole Brady Bunch thing going over at my pad I’d go grind over there so don’t tax my gig so hard-core cruster.
Munchin’ on some grindage!
My name’s Crawl and I’m the RA. And you are? No wait, don’t tell me – Sally? Jessie? Raphael
My name’s Crawl and I’m the RA. And you are? No wait, don’t tell me! Sally? Jessie? Raphael?
nasty. aaoooww…girlfriend girlfriend..aaaaowwww…
No, YOU wait a minute. I gotta tell you, Travis, it really tweaks
my melon to see a buff bro like Crawl here get wheezed on by a greasy
scum baaaag like you. So..you..just..chill.
oh so your inbred? excuse me? you know when your moms your dad and your dads your brother!
Person #1 : Where are you from?
Person #2 : South Dakota
Person #1 : Fresh off the farm, oh my God, I can’t believe it. Hallelujah. So you’re inbred?
Person#2 : What?
Person #1 : You know, where your mom’s your dad, and your dad’s your brother.
Sorry I am all out of Vodka!
Sorry Travis…I already asked Bec to marry me.
Sweety, here’s your little ringy.
Sorry, buddy, I just wanted to make the jewel shrivel on teh sun-dried tomato.
STEVEN TYLER PJ’S STEVEN TYLER PJ’S!!!!!
Steven Tyler pjs. Steven Tyler pjs.
That guy has bigger cones than I do.
There will be no partying in this hall between the hours of 5 and 6 a.m.
Well life on the farm is kinda laid back, aint much an old country boy like me cant hack. Early to rise, early in the sack. Thank god i’m a counrty boy.
What are those chaps? Cheak Chillers. You like?
What’d they do to ya, short cake?
Why do they call you Crawl? – Because thats how i used to get home my freshmen year.
Why do they call you Crawl? – cause thats how i allllways got hooome.
Why don’t you give the turkey a little kiss?
Ya know, where your mom’s your dad and your dad’s your brother
You have chickens?? Oh I Loooooove chickens! Are they extra crispy or original recipe?
you pick it, i stick it
You pick it…. I stick it!
You’re too late. Yeah, a couple weeks ago at school I already asked Bec to marry me.
you’ve got to take me to get some ,thay way I can take your’ll style and mine then inter-weive them. Yeehaa, I’m going to be a farmer……
youve got charisma……it’s a special quality of leadership that captures the popular imagination and inspires alligance and devotion.
[On the name of Crawl] 1.What kinda name is that? 2.Nickname. I got in my freahman year, ’cause that’s how I alwasy got home.
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Son in Law’: Quotes from the movie ‘Son in Law’