Movie Quotes from Simon Birch: Quotes from the movie Simon Birch

1) Well I met a man on the train. Old Boston and Maine. 2) You’re pregnant? 1) Mother. I just met him. 2) The last time you came home from Boston and Maine you cam home pregnant.

30 mississippi,30 misissippi I counted 34 mississippi.

(Simon is dying) Joe: Simon? Simon: Yeah? Joe: (sobbing) You’re my best friend in the whole world! Simon: I know that, stupid.

A lefty like me.

AH! a horse!

And the angels take you, into paradise

Come on were late. No you’re late I’m just riding with you.

Cut it out you assholes,Hey no tickling!

Faith is not in a floor plan.

For as much as I loved my mother, I knew that Simon loved her just as much, she was the only real mother he ever had

girl: simon, whats wrong?
simon: BOOBS!

Have a nice day. Goddam kids got no respect these days.

Hi Joe hi Miss Wentworth,hi Ben Goodrich.

i dont need proof i have faith, your problem is you have no faith.

i want to know if there’s a reason for things. i used to be certain but im not so sure anymore.

I was just thinking,last year we played in the squirt league right,this year were in the pee wee league. Do they want us to play ball or urinate?

I’m gonna leave you alone with your thoughts now.

I’m sorry,I’m sorry.

If God has made the church bake sale a priority, then we are all in a lot of trouble.

If we went around doing what we wanted to do, there’d be chaos.

Im freezin!!

Into Paradise, may the angels lead you.

It’s the virgin mary, eddie. what does joseph got to do with anything?

its the virgin mary, eddie. what does joseph got to do with anything.

Joe:My balls just turned into prunes. Simon: My balls just turned into raisons…Joe:My balls just turned into bullets Simon:My balls just turned into BeBe’s

Last year we were on the squirts, this year we are on the pee wees. Do they want us to play baseball or urinate?

Marjories getting breasts. I know. Preaty soon they’ll be boobs.

Maybe God sent him to be your father. God sent me a screwball with an armidillo?

Mine just turned into walnuts!

my ass hurts

My ball’s just turned into prunes.
Mine turned into raisons!

My balls just turned into marbles. My balls just turned into BBs.

Nice bag.

Oh boy thats alot of peas.

Oh man this is so boss.

See you later alligator,afterwhile crocidille.

sex makes people crazy

Slow down I’m a miricale ya know? Yea, yea.

Thank you miss Wentworth. You know what Simon thank you.

The last time you met a man on the Boston and Maine you became pregnant.

there is no god, its all bullshit

Theres my little doll.

Things will be different once God makes me a hero.

Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with. It paces like a snail when you can’t wait, then races like a gazzelle when you can’t catch your breath.

Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with. It responds like a snail at our impatience and races like a gazelle when you can’t catch your breath.

What does coffee and doughnuts have to do with God?

What I want to do and what I do are two sperate things. If we all went around doing what we wanted to do all the time there would be chaos.

What’s in the bag? Joseph!

when someone you love dies you don’t lose them all at once, you lose them in pieces

When someone you love dies, you don’t lose them all at once. You lose them in pieces, over time.

You’re already a bastard. You might as well be an enlightened one

You’re never prepared for the moment that will change your life

Your already a bastard, might as well be an enlighted one.

Your already a bastard, might as well be an enlightened one.

Your mother has the best breasts of all the mothers.

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