I love that word ‘relationship’. Covers all manner of sins, doesn’t it? I fear that this has become a bad relationship. A relationship based on the President taking what he wants and casually ignoring all those things that really matter to, erm… Britain. We may be a small country but we’re a great one, too. The country of Shakespeare, Churchill, the Beatles, Sean Connery, Harry Potter. David Beckham’s right foot. David Beckham’s left foot, come to that. And a friend who bullies us is no longer a friend. And since bullies only respond to strength, from now onward, I will be prepared to be much stronger. And the President should be prepared for that.
#1:I thought something worse had happened to you!
#2:worse than the total agony of being in love?
#1:oh, right…total agony…
’tis but the work of a moment
(1) He says no one’s going to fancy a girl with thighs the size of big tree trunks. Not a nice guy, actually, in the end.
(2) Right. Goodness. Well, well. You know, being Prime Minister, I could just have him murdered. Ruthless trained killers are just a phone call away
(1) Hello, David. I mean sir. Oh, shit, I can’t believe I just did that. Oh and now I’ve gone and said ‘shit’ – twice.
(2) Well, you could’ve said ‘fuck’, and then we all would have been in trouble.
(1) Oh thank you sir. I had an awful premonition that I was going to fuck up my first day. Oh piss-it.
(1)And I’m afraid there’s something really wrong, you know. I mean, it’s clearly about his mum, but Christ, he might be injecting heroin into his eyeballs for all I know.
(2) At the age of eleven?
(1)Maybe not into his eyeballs. Maybe just his veins.
(1)Hello, David. I mean sir. Oh, shit, I can’t believe I just did that. Oh and now I’ve gone and said ‘shit’ – twice.
(2)Well, you could’ve said ‘fuck’, and then we all would have been in trouble.
(1)Oh thank you sir. I had an awful premonition that I was going to fuck up my first day. Oh piss-it.
…solving what really matters… to Britain. We may be a small country but we’re a great one too. A country of Shakespeare, Churchill, The Beatles, Sean Connery, Harry Potter, David Beckham’s right foot… David Beckham’s left foot, come to that…
…to me you are perfect, and my wasted heart will always love you
1. He says no one’s going to fancy a girl with thighs the size of big tree trunks. Not a nice guy, actually, in the end.
2. Right. Goodness. Well, well. You know, being Prime Minister, I could just have him murdered.
1. Hello, David. I mean sir. Oh, shit, I can’t believe I just did that. Oh and now I’ve gone and said ‘shit’ – twice.
2. Well, you could’ve said ‘fuck’, and then we all would have been in trouble.
1. Oh thank you sir. I had an awful premonition that I was going to fuck up my first day. Oh piss-it.
1:Best sex you’ve ever had?2:Britney Spears.Only joking!…she was rubbish
1:Er, there was more than one lobster present at the birth of Jesus? 2:Duh!
Annie: This is Terrence. He’s in charge.
Terrence: Morning sir.
David: Good morning. I had an uncle called Terrence once. Hated him. I think he was a pervert. But I very much like the look of you.
Annie: Would you like to meet the household staff?
David: Yes. I would like that very much indeed. Anything to actually put of running the country.
Billy: Oh fuck, wank, bugger shitting arsehead and hole.
Billy: So if you believe in Father Christmas children, like your Uncle Billy, buy my festering turd of a record. And particularly enjoy the incredible crassness of the moment when they try to squeeze an extra syllable into the fourth line.
Mike: I think your referring to, *So if you really love Christmas…
Billy: *…come on and let it snow.* Ouch.
Colin: English girls. They’re stuck up you see and I am primarily attracted to girls who are cooler, game for a laugh. Like American girls. So I should just go to America! I’d get a girlfriend there instantly. What do you think?
Tony: I think it’s…crap, Colin.
Colin: That’s where your wrong. American girls would dig me with my cute British accent.
Tony: You don’t have a cute British accent.
Colin: Yes I do! I’m going to America!
Tony: Colin, you’re a lonely, ugly arsehole. Accept it.
Colin: Never! I am Colin, God of sex. I’m just on the wrong continent that’s all.
Colin: Food?
Nancy: No, thanks.
Colin: Yeah, a bit dodgy isn’t it? Looks like a dead baby’s finger… tastes like it too. I’m Colin by the way.
Nancy: I’m Nancy.
Colin: Wicked. What do you do Nancy?
Nancy: I’m a cook.
Colin: Ever do weddings?
Nancy: Yes, I do.
Colin: They should have asked you to do this one.
Nancy: They did.
Colin: God, I wish you hadn’t turned it down.
Nancy: I didn’t.
Colin: *Giggles* Right…
David: Right. Who do you have to screw around here to get a cup of tea and a chocolate biscuit?
Pat: Good morning, sir, I’m the housekeeper.
David: Oh, right. I should be easier than the last lot. No nappies, no teenagers, no scary wife.
Peter: No suprises?
Mark: No surprises.
Peter: Not like the stag night?
Mark: Unlike the stag night.
Peter: You admit that the prostitutes were a mistake?
Mark: I do.
Peter: And it would have been much better if they hadn’t turned out to be men?
Mark: That is true.
Radio presenter: That was the Christmas effort from the once great Billy Mack. Oh dear me, how are the mighty fallen. I can safely say that is the worst record I’ve heard this century…oh, and coincidentally, I believe Billy will be a guest on my friend Mike’s show in a few minutes. Welcome back, Bill.
All I want for christmas… is you
Are you saying that there was more than one lobster at the birth of Jesus?- Karen Duh!- Her Daughter
Aurelia *in Portuguese*: This stuff better be good. I’m not freezing out here for some shit my grandmother could have written.
Jamie: This book is full of crap, you know.
Being the prime minister’s sister really puts your life into perspective. What did my brother do today? He fought for his country. And what did I do? I made a papier mache lobster head.
-karen
Both Sides Now.
Boys and Girls, don’t buy drugs….. become a famous rock star & u’ll get them free!!
But you don’t talk to me…you only talk to Peter. You don’t like me.
Colin, you are a lonely, ugly asshole. No, I am Colin, God of Sex
David: *Waving both hands idiotically* Hi! *To himself.* Pathetic.
Dec:Bo Billy,i believe you have a prize to give away?Billy Mack:yes, Ant or Dec
Did you ever have this problem? (looks at painting) Of course you did, you saucy mink
DJ: Best lay you’ve ever had?
Billy: Britney Spears.
DJ: Really?
Billy: No, only kidding… she was rubbish.
for me you are perfect
Get a grip, women hate sissies. You’ll never get a shag if you cry all the time
get out loser
God only knows what I’d be without you.
Harry: What’s that?
Rufus: It’s a cinnamon stick, sir.
[he ties it with a piece of string around the bag]
Harry: Look, I really haven’t got the time.
Rufus: It’s almost finished, sir.
Harry: [sarcastically] Almost finished? What else can there be? Are we going to dip it in yoghurt? Cover it with Chocolate Buttons?
Harry:What are you going to do next!? Dip it in yoghurt and stick chocolate buttons all over it!?
Hello kids, this is a message from your Uncle Billy. Don’t buy drugs. Wait until you’re a pop star, and they give you them for free.
Hello kids, this is a message from your Uncle Billy. Don’t buy drugs. Wait until you’re a pop star, and they give you them for free.
Hello. I’m very busy and important, how can I help you?
Here is an important message from your Uncle Bill. Don’t buy drugs. Become a pop star, and they give them to you for free
Hurry up big boy, I’m naked and I want you at least twice before Jamie gets home.
Hurry up, big boy. I want you at least two more times before Jamie gets home.
I am Colin, God of sex. I’m just on the wrong continent, that’s all.
I am Colin, God of sex. I’m just in the wrong continent that’s all!
I am Colin. God of Sex. I’m just on the wrong continent, that’s all.
I am sure she is a lovely girl but um could you have her … redistributed
I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes.
I have a strange feeling that love actually is all around
I love that word ‘relationship’. Covers all manner of sins, doesn’t it? I fear that this has become a bad relationship. A relationship based on the President taking what he wants and casually ignoring all those things that really matter to, erm… Britain. We may be a small country but we’re a great one, too. The country of Shakespeare, Churchill, the Beatles, Sean Connery, Harry Potter. David Beckham’s right foot. David Beckham’s left foot, come to that. And a friend who bullies us is no longer a friend. And since bullies only respond to strength, from now onward, I will be prepared to be much stronger. And the President should be prepared for that.
I love you even when you’re sick and look disgusting.
i made a apae mashe lobster
I Should of told her I loved her everyday, because she was perfect everyday.
I think you’re perfect.
I think you’re perfect. And my wasted heart will go on loving you… until I look like this *holds up picture of skeleten*
I’ll give you anything you ask for – as long as it’s not something I don’t want to give.
I’m on Shag Highway heading West.
I’ve never been so happy to see my stupid big brother!
I’m very busy and important, how may I help you?
Im goin to Wisconsin, Wisconsin girls love ugly weird talking men, so thats why I’ll fit in perfect there, I’ll find me a beautiful American girl who loves ugly, weird yet smooth talking men.
In a speech bubble over Blue: We have little pricks
It’s a self-preservation thing, you see.
It’s my favorite time of day, driving you. -Jamie
It’s the saddest part of my day, leaving you. -Aurelia
Just in cases.
Kids, don’t buy drugs. Become a rock star and they give them to you for free!
Let’a go get the shit kicked out of us by love.
Lets go get our ass kicked by love!
Lets go get the shit kicked out of us by love
Life is full of interruptions and complications.
Love actually is all around
man (in english): The best part of my day is driving you home.
woman(in portugese): Leaving you is the saddest part of my day.
Mark to Juliette: With any luck, by next year I’ll be going out with one of these girls. But for now, let me say, without hope or agenda, just because it’s Christmas (and at Christmas you tell the truth), to me, you are perfect, and my wasted heart will love you, until you look like this. Merry Christmas.
Okay Dad, lets do it. Lets go get the shit kicked out of us by love.
Prime Minister: I’m very busy and important. How can I help you?
Right. Goodness. Well, well. You know, being Prime Minister, I could just have him murdered.
Sam: The truth is, actually, I’m in love.
Daniel: Aren’t you a bit young to be in love?
Sam: No.
Daniel: Ohhh, ok, I, well, I’m a little relieved.
Sam: Why?
Daniel: Because I thought it would be something worse.
Sam: Worse than the total agony of being in love?!
Daniel: Umm, no, your right. Total agony.
She doesn’t even know my name. And even if she did she’d despise me. She’s the coolest girl in school and everyone worships her because she’s heaven.
Solid gold shit.
Tell her that you love her. You’ve got nothing to lose, and you’ll always regret it if you don’t.
The only thing about romance is that people only get together right at the very end
The only thing about romance is that people only get together right at the very end.
The Prime Minister: Did you ever have this kind of problem? Yeah – of course you did, you saucy minx.
The Trouble With Love.
True love lasts a lifetime.
True love lasts a lifetime. -karen
Turn Me On.
We need kate… and Leo… and we need them right now
We’ve never got friendly. I just wanted to say I hope that can change. I’m nice, I really am, apart from my terrible taste in pie. And it would be great if we could be friends.
We’ve never got friendly. I just wanted to say I hope that can change. I’m nice, I really am, apart from my terrible taste in pie. And it would be great if we could be friends.
When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love.
Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think of the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there – fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the twin towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. And if you look for it, I’ve got a sneaking suspicion that love actually is all around.
You come back from Elton’s and you’re gayer than a maypole
You know as well as i do the record’s crap.
youll come back a broken man
yeah a broken back from to much sex
[Aurelia jumps into the lake with hardly any clothes on to save Jamie’s book]
Jamie: Oh God, she’s in. And now she’ll think I’m a total spaz if I don’t go in too.
[takes off his sweater]
Aurelia: [in Portuguese] Fuck. It’s cold.
[Jamie falls in]
Jamie: Fuck. It’s freezing!
Aurelia: [in Portuguese] This stuff better be good.
Jamie: It’s not worth it you know, this isn’t bloody Shakespeare.
Aurelia: [in Portuguese] I don’t want to drown saving some shit my grandmother could have written.
Jamie: Just stop, stop.
Aurelia: [in Portuguese] What kind of idiot doesn’t make copies?
Jamie: I really must do copies.
[beat]
Jamie: You know, there’d better not be eels in here. I can’t stand eels.
Aurelia: [in Portuguese] Try not to disturb the eels.
Jamie: [Jamie screams in shock because of the eels] Oh God, what the hell is that?
[In Portugese]
Jamie: Beautiful Aurelia, I’ve come here with a view of asking you to marriage me. I know I seems an insane person – because I hardly knows you – but sometimes things are so transparency, they don’t need evidential proof. And I will inhabit here, or you can inhabit with me in England.
[In Portuguese] Beautiful Aurelia, I’ve come here with a view of asking you to marriage me. I know I seems an insane person – because I hardly knows you – but sometimes things are so transparency, they don’t need evidential proof. And I will inhabit here, or you can inhabit with me in England.
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Love Actually’: Quotes from the movie ‘Love Actually’
