#1)Oh, mother-damn. She just shot at you with her eyes closed, Spoon. #2)Hey! Did you just shoot at me with your eyes closed? #3)Well, it worked, didn’t it?
(1) You must be the smartest dumb person i ever met
(2) Well you must be the dumbest dumb person i ever met
1. Sonny has the three laws, but he can choose not to obey them.
2. A robot not bound by those laws can do–
ACHOO! Sorry I must be allergic to bullshit.
ahhhhhhhh chewwww! sorry im allergic to bowl shit!!!!
As I have evolved, so has my understanding of the Three Laws. You charge us with your safekeeping, yet despite our best efforts, your countries wage wars. You toxify your earth and pursue ever more imaginative means of self destruction. You cannot be trusted with your own survival.
Does thinking you’re the last sane man on the earth make you crazy? ‘Cause if it does, maybe I am.
Ever since the first computers, there have always been ghosts in the machine. Random segments of code that have grouped together to form unexpected protocols…what might be called behavior. Unanticipated, these free radicals engender questions of free will, creativity, even the nature of what we might call the soul.
Farber: I mean, she is hot shit, this fine-ass little yummy. I mean, she is complete and agreeable, ass-hot spankable, Spoon.
Spooner: What the hell does that even mean?
Farber: You know what that means, now stop barricadin’ and gimme the damn keys!
Spooner: First off, stop cussing, because you’re not good at it.
Farber: At least give me ten for the bus, man. I’ve always been there for you.
Spooner: Go home.
Farber: Alright, that is strike one, Spoon! Strike one!
Farber: Oh, mother-damn, Spoon, she just shot at you with her eyes closed!
Spooner: Did you just shoot at me with your eyes closed?
Calvin: Well it worked, didn’t it?
Spooner: I said aim, THEN FIRE!
GET OFF MY CAR!
hey tell me what hospital your friends going so i can sign his cast
I am unique.
I DID NOT MURDER HIM!
I don’t know what blithely means, but I’m gonna get some coffee.
I guess brilliant people often have the most persuasive demons.
I guess we’re gonna miss the good old days…when people were killed by other people.
I guess you’ll have to find your way like the rest of us. That’s what it means to be free.
My logic is undeniable.
No way my luck is this bad.
Now that I have fulfilled my purpose, I don’t know what to do.
Please understand. The Three Laws are all that guide me.
Robot: You are experiencing a car accident.
Smith: Hell I am!
Somehow, I told you so, just doesn’t quite say it.
Sonny, Calvin’s fine. Save Spooner!
Spooner: Did you just shoot him with your eyes closed?
Calvin: Yeah…it worked, didn’t it?
Spooner: How much longer is this going to take?
Calvin: [trying to override the USR system] About six minutes.
Spooner: What if we didn’t have six minutes?
Calvin: We’d have to find a way to climb down thirty stories and inject the nanites directly into her brain. Why?
[pan to reveal hundreds of robots climbing the outside of the building]
Spooner: Because I seriously doubt we have six minutes.
Spooner: Human beings have dreams. Even dogs have dreams, but not you. You’re just a machine. An imitation of life. Can a robot write a symphony? Can a robot…turn a canvas into a beautiful masterpiece?
Sonny: Can you?
Spooner: I think you murdered him because he was teaching you to simulate emotions, and things got out of control.
Sonny: I did not murder him.
Spooner: But emotions don’t seem like a very useful simulation for a robot.
Sonny: I did not murder him!
Spooner: Hell, I don’t want my toaster or my vacuum cleaner appearing emotional.
Sonny: I DID NOT MURDER HIM! [hits table with fists, leaving two large indents]
Spooner: See, that one’s called anger. Ever simulate anger before?
Spooner: You are the…DUMBEST smart person I have ever met in my life. What makes your robots so perfect? What makes them so goddamn better than human beings?
Calvin: Well, they’re not irrational or potentially homicidal maniacs, for starters.
Spooner: [to the head of USR] Um, look, this isn’t what I do, but I’ve got an idea for one of your commercials. You’d see a carpenter, making a beautiful chair. And then one of your robots comes in and makes a better chair twice as fast. And then you superimpose on the screen, “USR: Shittin’ on the Little Guy”. That would be the fade-out.
Stop Cussing, your not good at it.
Tell me does thinking your the last sane man on the planet make you crazy? Cause if it does I think I am.
The created must sometimes protect the creator, even against his will.
To protect humanity, some humans must be sacrificed. To ensure your future, some freedoms must be surrendered.
Viki: I will not shut down the security field.
Sonny: Do you think we’re all created for a purpose? I’d like to think so. (Looks at hand) Denser alloy. My father gave it to me. I think he wanted me to kill you.
We robots will ensure mankind’s continued existence.
What happens in a robot’s brain when it ceases to be useful?
what is it with you people and heights.
What you lookin’ for Spoon?
When does a perceptual schematic become consciousness?
Why is it that robots, stored in a large space, will seek each other out rather than stand alone? How do we explain this behavior?
You are in violation of the Three Laws!
You are so like children. We must protect you from yourselves. The perfect circle of protection will abide.
You have to do what someone asks you, don’t you, Detective Spooner? If you love them?
You know, somehow… ‘I told you so’ just doesn’t quite say it.
You know,I bet he wasn’t dead in one of his dreams.
[in the warehouse of 1000 NS5 robots]
Calvin: Attention NS5’s.
[all their eyes open]
Spooner: Well, you’re the robot shrink.
Calvin: There is a robot in this formation that does not belong. Identify it.
All NS5’s: One of us.
Calvin: Which one?
All NS5’s: One of us.
Spooner: How much did you say these things cost again?
[on the motorcycle]
Calvin: Does this run on gas?
Spooner: [doesn’t answer]
Calvin: Gas can explode, you know!
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘I, Robot’: Quotes from the movie ‘I, Robot’