Movie Quotes from Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason: Quotes from the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason
1)By the way is it true he always says ‘I’m sorry but I think I need to cum’? 2)Who told you that? 1)Well it’s common knowledge, isn’t it?
1)Ciggie? 2)No, no thanks. I’ve given up again. 1)Oh shame, I’ve found them very useful. I take great comfort in the fact that they may kill me before things actually get worse.
1)Doesn’t everyone deserve a second chance? 2)Except Hitler. 1)Well he was very, very, very naughty.
1)He’s young enough to be your grandson. 2)I know, isn’t that great?!
1)Hi Dad, how’s it going? 2)I wish I was dead.
1)I can’t see anywhere soft to land 2)How bout your ass?
1)I just had a rather graphic shag flashback and you do have a genuinely gorgeous bottom. 2)Thank you. I’m actually with the Mexican ambassador, the head of Amnesty International and the Undersecetary of the trade industry…and you’re on speaker phone. 1)Oh, right.
1)I thought you were there already, doing research. 2)Oh fuck no, I make it up as I go along.
1)jamie Osborne. Talking to her is like swimming in the sea and being stung repeatedly by an enormous jellyfish 2)Bridget, how’s it going with that divine man of yours? You must be so pleased to have a boyfriend at last. 1)First jellyfish of the evening. 2)Is he taking you to the Lord Council dinner? Oh, well I’m sure he’s just forgotten. Better start slimming into that dress!
1)Next time I will not fuck it up Mom. 2)Language darling. 1)Sorry. Next time I will not fuck it up Mother.
1)Nice jumper. 2)My mother’s taste never falters.
1)So how are you feeling? 2)Completely embarrased. 1)Don’t be, you’re charming on drugs. In the future…just say yes.
1)There must’ve been something you liked about me. 2)Well…you have a nice car, and quite nice manners, outside the bedroom, that’s about it. And by the way I know EXACTLY where Germany is. The question is, do you know the location of your asshole!? 1)As a matter of fact I do know the exact location of my asshole…and her’s for that matter.
1)What on earth are you doing? 2)Getting dressed. 1)Why are you dancing around in that tent? 2)Because I don’t want you to see any of my wobbly bits. 1)Well now that’s a bit pointless, isn’t it? Because I happen to have a very high regard for your wobbly bits, in all circumstances. 2)Really? 1)Absoutely. I think it’s high time we had another look.
1)You are angry 2)No, I’m not angry. I’m just disappointed. 1)Disappointed? Oh God that’s worse than angry. 2)I’m just disappoionted I can’t take you home this instant.
1. There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you for a long time. 2.Yes? (expects proposal) 1. My darling, darling Bridget. Would you like to….go on a skiing mini-break with me?
1.(sees face person 2) Oh God, what is it now? 2.Are you having an affair with Rebecca? 1.I won’t dignify that question with an answer. 2.Right.(walks off)
1.Ah Daniel! Your Madrid piece was outstanding. Full of insights; really original. 2.Oh cheers Jeremy, thanks mate. Ya, I really appreciate that. Lads worked really hard on that one. (1 walks away] Tosser. (to Bridget) Talking of which, how is Mark Darcy?
1.And this is Horatio… 2.Horatio? 1.Yes, Horatio.
1.Can I ask you a question Bridget? 2.Of course, any question… as long as it’s not, ‘Will You Marry Me’.
1.Ever fancied doing it in the dark with a total stranger? (2 turns light on) 1. Okay, well maybe not a total stranger.
1.I will not fuck it up again, Mum. 2.Bridget! Language!
1.Sorry. I will not fuck it up again… mother.
1.If you love her so much Darcy, why don’t you marry her? 2.I’ll bear that in mind. 1.She’d definitely shag me then.
1.What on Earth are you doing? 2.Getting dressed. 1.Why’re you dancing around in that tent business? 2.Because I don’t want you to see any of my wobbly bits. 1.Well now that’s a bit pointless isn’t it. As I happen to have a very high regard for your wobbly bits. In all circumstances. 2.Really? 1.Absolutely. I think it’s high time we had another look.
1.Will you step outside, please? 2.Oh no, it’s not possible.
1.You know, I never really understood why you wanted to date me. It seems so unlikely. 2.Come on, Jones, for God’s sake. You’re sexy. You make me laugh-at you of course, not with you. And you were, incidentally, the best shag I ever had.
Friends – they spend years trying to find you a boyfriend, but the moment you get one, they instantly tell you to dump him!
He must still love me!
I spent the night with a gorgeous Thai girl who turned out to be a gorgeous Thai boy!
I truly believe that happiness is possible… even when you’re thirty-three and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.
Jellyfish alert! Jellyfish alert!
My legs only come up to here.
New York. The big, juice apple.
No. Moment’s gone.
Pull the thingy, or you will die!
That’s not your coat.
What about a wig? They’re lawyers aren’t they? Lawyers love wigs.
Wonder what Mark Darcy would be like as a father. Father to his children I mean, not to me. That would be weird Oedipus-like thought.
You can’t do this, I’m English! And an award-winning journalist… Well, maybe not award-winning, but I have been to *lots* of award ceremonies.
You think you’ve found the right man, but there’s so much wrong with him, and then he finds there’s so much wrong with you, and then it all just falls apart.
And you thought all I knew about Thailand was pussies and ping pong balls.
As a matter of fact i happen to know exactly where Germany is, but the question is Do you know where the location of yor asshole is?
Chuck him while you’re still ahead and not pregnant with his unwanted child!!
Daniel, I really think that you should go fuck yourself, or her, but definitely not me.
December thirty first. Year-end summary. Prison stays, one. Lesbian kisses, one. Pounds lost, minus one. Boyfriends lost but then re-gained following major diplomatic incident, one. Marriage proposals, one. An excellent years progress.
Five weeks later, weight…four thousand pounds and I am enjoying a relationship with two men simultaneously. The first first called Ben – the other Jerry. Number of current boyfriends…zero.
He actually seems to be the villian of this piece
I know there’s no music playing and it’s not snowing, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be really something.
I love you. I always have and I always will. Oh! Um. I don’t love you, and I never have, and I never will. Sorry.
I’m available for dates if he feels so inclined
I’m going to go to the loo, then I’m going to come back and we’re going to be civilized.
I’m not in love with him. How could I be when I’m totally heartbrokenly smitten with someone else?
I’m scared shitless…but you know, perky.
It isn’t whether or not I know the location of Germany. The question is, do you know the location of your asshole!
It was as usual crammed full with some of the most dangerous perverts in the United Kingdom, disguised as close personal friends of my parents.
It was going to be a fantastic weekend shag-a-thon
My motto is, when in Rome – do as many Roman’s as you can.
No, of course not. So what’s the alternative? Sleeping in his parents bed and breastfeeding until he’s a teenager whilist attending progressive school, where the entire day is spent singing yellow submarine and practicing group masturbation.
Oh my God, I’m pregnant… and I’m going to DIE!?
Oh no, no thank you – the uh, mini spotted dick rather finished me off.
One minute you’re closer to someone than anyone in the world..
the next minute you’re never going to see them again
Open your fucking parachute!!
So as you can see, I’ve found my happy ending at last. And I truly believe that happiness is possible, even when you’re thirty-three and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.
Sorry, sorry everyone – it’s my stalker.
Stop staring at me while I’m asleep. Go and find something to do.
Stop! Enough! Enough! If you’re going to do it, you really ought to do it properly. After all, Madonna is nothing if not a perfectionist.
The question is…what happens after you walk off into the sunset?
Unit two, give me a close-up of the porker.
Who cares about the unprofessional hiccup? The fact is I’ve been in a functional relationship with an adult male for six wonderful weeks, four fabulous days and seven precious hours. Or to put it another way, seventy-one estactic shags!
Wouldn’t you like to be my little girl guide? Hum?
You can’t do this, I’m an award-winning journalist! Well maybe not award-winning, but I have been to lots of award ceremonies!
You could never muster the strength to fight for me.
You have absoutley no messages…not a single one…not even from your mother.
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason’: Quotes from the movie ‘Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason’