Movie Quotes from Chicago: Quotes from the movie Chicago

Renee Zellweger and Catherine Zeta-Jones were absolutely fantastic
singing and dancing quite well in the movie Chicago.They are absolutely gorgeous.

Roxy-I’m a star…and the audience loves me. And they love me for lovin’ them and I love them for lovin’ me, and we looooove each other…and that’s because none of us got enough love in our childhoods. And that’s showbiz…..kid!

#1- Pop #2- Six #3- Squish #4- Uh uh #5- Cicero #6- Lipschitz!

‘You been screwing the milkman!’he says. ‘You BEEN SCREWING THE MILKMAN!’

(After Velma -Catherine Zeta-Jones- does her dance): I know the first parts Shit.

…and that’s because none of us got enough love in our childhoods. And that’s showbiz…kid.

1) My client has never owned a diary and even if she had it would be invastion of privacy and illegal search and seizure 2) YEAH! And she broke the lock!

1) Where the hell is your sister? 2) She’s not herself tonight.

1)He was trying to burgle me!
2)From what I hear, he’s been burgling you three times a week for the past month!

1)You know, I was there. I was there that night you plugged your husband. 2)So was half of Chicago.

1. Are you sorry? 2. Are you kidding?

1.But I simply cannot do it alone!
2.Uhh, so wheres the part where you blow her brains out?
1.Ok I’ll level with u…

1.I just hope the fall didn’t hurt the baby 2. Shit!!

1: Andy
2: It’s Amos
1: Who said it wasn’t

1: I just hope the fall didn’t hurt the baby.
2: Shit!

Billy: So what are you going to do? Divorce her?
Amos: You’re damn right! I’ll divorce her! She probably won’t even notice.

Billy: You’re a phoney celebrity, a flash in a pan. In a couple of weeks no one will give a shit about you. That’s Chicago.

Billy:Is she pregnant?
Doctor: Yes.
Billy: Would you be willing to swear your life on that?
Doctor: Yes.
Billy: Good. Now button your fly.

Roxie: So pretty soon, I started fooling around. Then I started screwing around…which is fooling around without dinner.

Roxie: They didn’t even want my photo. I just can’t understand that!

Velma: Fifty bucks for a phone call?! You must make a lot of wrong numbers, Mama.

Velma: What’s your talent – washing and drying?

Am I guilty or Not guilty judge? I’m guilty you mother fucker….but if you say i’m not guilty i’ll fuck you so hard that your mom will say wow thats some hard fuckin! And it will make your nest door neighbor say OMG your fucking him too hard! And all that Jazz

And all that Jazz

and then some

And yet we both reached for the gun
Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes we both
Oh yes we both
Oh yes, we both reached for
The gun, the gun, the gun, the gun
Oh yes, we both reached for the gun
For the gun.

Ask any of the chickies in my pen. They’ll tell you I’m the biggest mother hen. I love them all and all of them love me, because the system works . . . the system called reciprocity.

Billy Flinn:Right, Trixie. Roxie:Its Roxie. Billy Flinn:Oh,yeah I was just kidding.

Billy Flynn: God save Illinois.

cellophane, mister cellophane, should i bend my name? mister cellopane, cause you can look right through me, walk right by me, and never know i’m there.

Com’on babe why dont we paint the town…and all that jazz. IM gonna rouge my knees and pull my stockings down so u can screw me realhard

Come on babe why dont we paint the town

Cop: Name of deceased…Fred Casely Amos: Fred Casely? How could he be a burgler. My wife knows him. He sold us our furnature. He gave us 10% off Roxie: Lord knows he ain’t got the smarts

Detective: Name of deceased, Fred Casely.
Amos: Fred Casely? How can he be a burgler? He sold us our furniture… he gave us ten percent off.
Roxie: Lord knows he ain’t got the smarts.

Don’t look so tragic ol’boy you must learn to accept defeat gracefully. After all, your case will come up for review in 10 to 20 years, and you will get your name in the papers all over again.

Dont think your going to get in glove…that would be moving fast…thats like 3rd base but you can get in my pants

everybody loves a —-

Fred Casely? How can he be a burgler? My wife knows him! He sold us our furniture! He gave us 10% off!

Fresh towels for the can…

FUCK ME!

HE ran in to my knife! He ran into my knife ten times!

He ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times

He used to like to take me out and show me off….Ugly guys tend to do that a lot…

HELLO DOLLY GET OFF MY PENIS

Hello Fuckers. I am Queen Latifah. I might be good to you, if you get on my good side, and hump it till there is no to morrow…HEAR THAT COCK SUCKEERS!!! You better behave your ass and pay me nice, with a sweety cummy used dildo that vibrates so hard it sings! And when you’re done, i want you to take maple syrup, and pour it into your pussy, and cum onto my pancakes.

Hello Statue of liberty if i hear on wod cum out of your mouth then i’m going to fuck you!

Here a little piece of advice. Direct from me to you. Lay off the caramels.

hey i enjoy geetting raped by little chimpanzees and enjoy getting tity fucked by chihuahuas.. while getting sexually assaulted by roosters and getting head from fire ants!!!

Hey i live ya honey i love ya…now get on on the bed and lets fuck you hott piece of ass! If you get undressed wuick enough…i’ll suck your ear lobe until it gets blue in the face and then i nibble the head of your dick until it turns an aqua clearish sorta color, and then i’ll send in a stripper to clip the heair off your back so you can give me a smooth piggy back ride through a pool of cum then my grandpa made with his own authentic cum! And after were drenched in the cum and then we’ll toss a salad and let it sit on the kitchen table while we fuck on it and it makes an awful salad lettuce mess all over us and until the lettuce sticks to our body because were sweaty and rolling around in it! After we eat the salad off each other, then i’ll calmy take you into the room and stick a gun to your head and sing about how your the funniest honey i know, then i’ll rub my left tit in your face while singing rock a bye baby! The i’ll pull the trigger and shoot your ass, and then your right ear lobe ,a dn then the ring toe on your foot on the right foot! and then I’ll simly finish you off by shooting you in the balls!

Hey I wanna fuck your dad and then a clown from the circus….and if i go to Curcuit City then all hells gonna break loose….I love fucking people from curcuit city..because they always let me twist there man nipple…and sometimes they let me poor kiwi strawberry sluchy all over them and let me take me dog to eat it off of them!

How about I take you home and fuck you until your private parts hurt!!!!! And until i have to runinto your knife!

how can they see with sequins in their eyes?

hump bitch cock fuck ass mother fucker slut whore hoe

Hunyak: Mit kereshek enit Ost Monyakwe a herem shlokemle fochtaferrin en me gleshiontoma fe De nem egos en ertetlan vayoke Ner te dam Mer moya Uncle Sam oy entettam Probaltom a rendershagen megmar anzi dertatek meg (Yeah, but did ya do it?) Uh uh…Not Guil..ty

I caught them in #17 — the spread eagle!

I didn’t ask if she was guilty, i din’t ask if she was innocent, i didn’t ask if she was a lesbian, and i didn’t ask her bra size. I asked if you had $5000, and you, Amonghojiloppopiopenisfuckercomjidlyfuckfuckass shiter, tyou said you do! All that is here is $3000. I need that money for a new penis!!! So, i will take your case, but you better be the best anal fucker in chicago. you re going to have to go at it so hard your penis will turn blueeish yellow.. Then, we must go swimming in a lake of pee, from the bodies of the lovely gay lesbian rockettes. Then, all the pissers will cum and sweat all over me, and you should lick it off, and rub it off with your bals.

I guess you could say that we broke up because of artistic differences. He saw himself as alive…and I saw him dead!

I hope I haven’t taken up too much of your time.

I know the first part’s shit. The second part, the second part is really nifty.

I started fooling around, and then I started screwing around…which is fooling around…without dinner

I wanna fuck your feet, and lick em’

I want to stomped and melested by a herd of dirty sea gulls! I love when roosters fuck my ass real hard and bite my nipples until they get ripped off and eaten by fleas! I hate it when osteriches think theyre cool and try to peck at my scrodum!

I was cooking dinner..slicing the turkey, and minding my own business, when suddenly Merv walks in, in a jealous rage. ‘You’ve been screwing the milkman!’ he says. He was crazy and he kept saying,’YOU’VE BEEN SCREWING THE MILKMAN!’ Then he ran into my knife…he ran into my knife TEN times!!

I’ll suck your dick if I pay you 100 dollars

If you want my gravy, pepper my Ragu, spice it up for Mamma, she’ll get hot for you.

Let’s all stroke together
Like the Princeton crew
When you’re strokin’ Mama
Mama’s strokin’ you

lets fuck and thats all there is too it

Lets fuck in a pond full of white hammer head sharks until we get saveagly ripped apart and eaten by them! And thats Chicago!

Lets fuck on a hard sharp reef until you die from all the blood lossage!

Mamma: What are you gonna tell the jury?
Roxie Hart: I’m gonna tell them the truth.
Mamma: The truth’s a sure-fire way into the death house…
Roxie Hart: Jesus, Mary and Joseph!
Mamma: You’re talking to the wrong people…

Mister Cellophane…

Mr. Billy Flinn in the Press Conference Rag. Notice how his mouth never moves….almost

My audience loves me, and I love my audience..and they love me for loving them, and I love them for loving me..and we all just LOVE eachother.

My sister and I had an act that couldn’t flop. My sister and I were headed straight for the top. My sister and I made a thou a week at least, but my sister is now unfortunately deceased. Oh, it’s sad, I know, but fact is still a fact and now all that remains is the remains of a perfect double act.

No, I’m no one’s wife but, oh I love my life! And all that jazz!

No, not chew. POP.

Now, look Hart, I don’t like to blow my own horn, but believe me, if Jesus Christ had lived in Chicago today, had had 5000 dollars, had come to me, things would’ve turned out differently.

Oh yes, they both reached for the gun the gun the gun the gun…

oo im a star…. and the audience loves me …. and i love them … and they love me for loving them … and i love them for loving me … and we love each each other … and thats cos none of us got enough love in our childhoods… and thats showbiz .. KiD!!!

pop six…squish uh uh ciscero lipshitz

Pop…six….squish…huh-uh…..Cicero….Lipschitz…

Roxie Hart: You know, I was there. I was there that night you plugged your husband.
Velma Kelly: So was half of Chicago.

Roxie to Velma: Here’s a little advice, from me to you, lay off the caramels.

Roxie: But look at that soul…I tell that whole is a whole lot greater than the some of his parts

Roxie: Forget it. It will never work.
Velma: Why not?
Roxie: ‘Cause I hate you.
Velma: There’s only one business where that’s no promblem at all.

Roxie: I used to have this boyfriend who used to take me out a lot and show me off…ugly guys like to do that.

Roxie: I’m a star… and the audience loves me! and I love them! And they love me for loving them and I love them for loving me… and we love eachother. And that’s cause none of us got enough love in our childhood. And that’s showbiz… kid.

Roxie:O God thats beautiful!Billy:Cut out God. Stick to where your better aquainted.

She stole my garters!

She was telling me some cock and bull story about how I should say I did it cuz I was sure to get off

She’d say ‘What’s your sister like?’ I’d say ‘Men!’ She’d say your the cat’s meow and then we’d wow the crowd, again.

She’d say What’s your sister like? I’d say ‘men. She’d say You’re the cats meow. Then we’d wow the crowd again.

She’d say: What’s your sister like? I’d say: Men.

Single he told me. Single my ass! not only was he married, oh no1 he had six wives. one of those mormons you know. so that night he came home and I ffixed him his drink as usual…you know some guys just can’t hold their arsenic

So I said,’If you pop that gum one more time…’ And he did. So I took the shotgun off the wall and fired two warning shots…into his head!

So i started foolin around then i started screwin around which is foolin around without dinner

so i started screwin around … which is foolin around without dinner

Some men just can’t hold their cyanide.

Sometimes I’m right, sometimes I’m wrong, but he doesnt care, he’ll string along, he loves me so …… that funny honey of mine.

Stop it you stong whore i wont let you touch my eybrow and then fuck me

Stop staying at the Flamingo hotel just to look at the flamingos! Its rude to stare…and i saw you staring at them the last time you were there and i wanted to say you are a hoe bitch who wont stop staring at loins!

Take her down to the Cook County Jail.

That’s Chicago!

they say that life is tit for tat
and that’s the way i live
so i deserve a lot of tat
for what i’ve got to give

They say that life is tit for tat
And that’s the way I live
So, I deserve a lot of tat
For what I’ve got to give

This trial…The whole world…It’s all…show business!

Uh-uh! Not gui-lty!

Velma singing: She’d say what’s your sister like? I’d say men. She’d say you’re the cat’s meow then we’d wow the crowd again!

Velma: I can’t take it anymore. All I ever hear about now is that DUMB TOMATO!

When Amos made love to me, it was like he was fixing a carborator or something…I love ya honey, I love ya!

When i pass the basket,folks contribute to.You put in for mama,she’ll put out for you!

Who ever wrote al of those disgusting quotes had better not do it again…my 8 year old daughter was sitting on my lap while I was reading the Chicago quotes and she can read…it took me a long time to get her to stop using those words…i am very dissappointed, and please don’t do that again.

whoever wrote those disgusting quotes not related to chicago in any way has absolutley way too much time on their hands

why are people so sad? i was reading this with my younger sister, shes only 6, and now shes cussing like a pro, thanks alot big shot.

Would you please tell the audience…err, the jury what happened?

You can like the life you live in, You can live the lif you like.
You can even marry Harry, but mess around with Ike. And that’s good, isn’t it grand.

you know before i met Amos i used to date this well to do ugly bootlegger who liked to take me out and show me off…ugly guys like to do that

You know how people have these little habits that get ya down? Like Bernie. Bernie liked to chew gum…no not chew…Po P. So i come home this one day, and im really irritated, and im lookin for a little bit of sympathy. And there’s Bernie, lying on the couch, drinkin a beer, and chewin…no not chewin…Popiinnn…so i said to him. i said you pop that gum one more time…and he did. so i took his shot gun off the wall, and i fired two warning shots….INTO HIS HEAD!

You know how people have those little habbits that get you down? Like Bernie. He liked to chew gum. No! Not chew. Po…P. So I come home this one day and I am feeling kinda irritated and want some sympathy and there Bernie is laying on the couch drinking a beer and chewing. NO! Not chewing Popping! So I told him and I said…if you pop that gum one more time…..and…. he did. So I took a shot gun off the wall and fired two warning shots. Into …his….HEAD!

You know how some guys have habits that get ya down? Like Berny…Berny liked to chew gum..no…pop gum. Well, I come home from work one day and I am really irritated and looking for a little sympathy..and there’s Berny..on the couch and chewing…no popping. So I said ‘Berny! You pop that gum one more time!!..’ And he did..so I took the shotgun off the wall and I fired two warning shots…into his head!!

You know how some people have these little habits that get you down? Like…cock sucker, cock sucker liked to look at his own dick, no not look self suck! So i come home this one day and i’m lookin for a little sympathy, and theres cock sucker, lying on the couch watchin some porn and lookin, no not lookin, self suckin! So i said, you thrust your dick into your mouth one more time…SHIT…and he did, so I pulled a bow and arrow off the wall and then killed him!

You know some guys just can’t hold their arsenic. (not cyanide…lol)

You know, I’m standing in the kitchen… carving up the chicken…minding my own business…when in storms my husband Wilbur in a jealous rage. *You been screwing the milkman?* he says. He was crazy! And he kept on screaming, *YOU BEEN SCREWING THE MILKMAN!!!* And then he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times.

You know…some guys just can’t handle their arsenic.

You Ran into my knife go damn it…you mother fucker…i hate you…i didnt screw the ,milk man…jees you ran into my knife 1002 times!!!!AHHHHHHHHH

You see, I was a butterfly, drawn to the flame, a moth, crushed by the, by the…so I guess you want to know why I shot the bastard.

You want some advice? Well here’s a piece of advice from me to you:
lay off the caramels.

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!

[ANNOUNCER]
And now the six merry murderesses of the Crookem County Jail in their rendition of ‘The Cell Block Tango’

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!
(4X)

[ALL]
He had it coming
He had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you’d have been there
If you’d have seen it

[VELMA]
I betcha you would have done the same!

[LIZ]
Pop
[ANNIE]
Six
[JUNE]
Squish
[HUNYAK]
Uh uh
[VELMA]
Cicero
[MONA]
Lipschitz!
(2X)

[LIZ (Spoken)]
You know how people
have these little habits
That get you down. Like Bernie.
Bernie like to chew gum.
No, not chew. POP. So I came home this one day,
And I am really irritated, and
looking for a little sympathy
and there’s Bernie layin’
on the couch, drinkin’ a beer
and chewin’. No, not chewin’.
Poppin’. So, I said to him,
I said, ‘You pop that
gum one more time…’
and he did.
So I took the shotgun off the wall
and I fired two warning shots…
…into his head.

[ALL]
He had it coming
He had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you’d have been there
If you’d have heard it
I betcha you would
Have dome the same!

[ANNIE (Spoken)]
I met Ezekiel Young from
Salt Lake city about two years ago
and he told me he was single
and we hit it off right away.
So, we started living together.
He’d go to work, he’d come home, I’d
fix him a drink, We’d have dinner.
And then I found out,
‘Single’ he told me?
Single, my ass. Not only
was he married
…oh, no, he had six wives.
One of those Mormons, you know. So that
night, when he came home, I fixed him
his drink as usual.
You know, some guys just can’t hold
their arsenic.

[ALL]
He had it coming
He had it coming
He took a flower
In its prime
And then he used it
And he abuse

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