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Best lines 6: More of the best funny and stupid lines and quotes

Here are some more of the best funny and stupid lines and quotes

If you don’t care where you are, then you ain’t lost.

If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

If you put it off long enough, it might go away.

If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything.

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

If you try and don’t succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

If you understand what you’re doing, you’re not learning anything.

If you’re happy, you’re successful.

If you’re not having fun, then you’re not doing it right.

Illegal drugs are the chlorine in the gene pool.

In America, anybody can be president. That’s one of the risks you take.

In a world without walls and fences who needs Windows and Gates?

In the dark I hold your hand, because in the light you look like a man.

It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

It’s better to be wanted for murder that not to be wanted at all.

It’s better to keep your mouth shut and have people think you are a fool than to open it and remove any lingering doubt.

It’s like deja vu all over again.

It’s not reality that’s important, but how you perceive things.

know I’m paranoid, but am I paranoid enough? –Tom Clancy.

I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers. –Peter Kaye.

It’s people that give drinking a bad name.

It’s the squeaky wheel that gets the grease.

Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers.

Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.

Lead me not into temptation. I can find the way myself.

Learn from my parent’s mistake. Don’t have kids!

Learn from your parents’ mistakes – use birth control.

Learning from your mistakes is smart, learning from the mistakes of others is wise.

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.

Life exists for no known purpose.

Life is an open door. It can be closed at any time, so don’t complain about the draught.

Life is what happens to you when you’re busy making other plans.

Life’s a bitch, and then you’re reincarnated.

Life’s a bleach and then you dye.

Linux: because rebooting is for adding new hardware.

Logic is in the eye of the logician.

Love is atemporary insanity curable by marriage.

Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.

Lunix… Because i’m better than you.

Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.

Marriage. An expensive way of getting your laundry done for free.

Married men live longer than single men, but they’re a lot more willing to die.

Page Topic: More of the best funny and stupid lines and quotes

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One Response to “Best lines 6: More of the best funny and stupid lines and quotes””

1. dan Says:
   April 16th, 2009 at 5:01 am

   Two guys walked into a bar.
   One survived

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Section: Best One Liners