Funny English From Around The World
Funny English Bloopers Too Close To Home
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Funny Sports Bloopers: Dumb quotes by athletes and sports celebrities
“I can play in the center, on the right, and occasionally on the left side.” – soccer star David Beckham, asked if he was a “volatile” player.
Sorry, I don’t know much about you. I don’t follow tennis.”
Christina Aguilera to Tiger Woods, after he told her he loved her music.
“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.” - Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
“We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.” - Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks.
“Half this game is ninety per cent mental.” - Danny Ozark, Philadelphia Phillies manager
Well, I see in the game in Minnesota that Terry Felton has relieved himself on the mound in the second inning. — Fred White, Kansas City Royals sportscaster, reading a wire-service summary that mistakenly showed the same starter and relief pitcher for the Minnesota Twins.
“One good bit of news for England is that Ian Bothams groin is back to full strength.” — BBC Radio Announcer Eleanor Oldroyd.
“I’m rich. What am I supposed to do, hide it?”
-Detroit Tiger Lou Whitaker, arriving in a stretch limo for a players’ union meeting during the 1994 baseball strike.
“I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf.”
-Tug McGraw, asked whether he preferred grass or Astroturf
“I told [GM] Roland Hemond to go out and get me a big name pitcher. He said, ‘Dave Wehrmeister’s got 11 letters. Is that a big enough name for you ?’”
-Eddie Eichorn, White Sox owner
“Raise the urinals.”
-Darrel Chaney on how management could keep the Braves on their toes
“The only reason I don’t like playing in the World Series is I can’t watch myself play.”
-Reggie Jackson
“They shouldn’t throw at me. I’m the father of five or six kids.”
-Baseball player Tito Fuentes, after getting hit by a pitch.
“I’m a 4-wheel-drive pickup type of guy. So is my wife.”
-Baseball player Mike Greenwell
“It’s permanent, for now.”
-Cincinnati Red Roberto Kelly, announcing his new name would be “Bobby.”
“There is one word in America that says it all, and that word is, ‘You never know.’”
-Pitcher Joaquin Andujar
“That’s why I don’t talk. Because I talk too much.”
-Joaquin Andujar
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Section: Funny English Bloopers & Mistakes