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Funny Pickup Lines Comebacks
Funny comebacks to stupid, dumb and funny pickup lines.
Here’s some funny responses to have in mind, just in case some guy tries any “clever”, funny or dumb pick up lines on you.
Top pick up line comebacks:
Man: “Haven’t we met before?”
Woman: “Maybe. I’m the receptionist at the VD Clinic.”
Man: “Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
Woman: “Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.”
Man: “Is this seat empty?”
Woman: “Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.”
Man: “So, wanna go back to my place ?”
Woman: “Well, I don’t know. Will two people fit under a rock?”
Man: “Your place or mine?”
Woman: “Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine.”
Man: “I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
Woman: “It’s in the phone book.”
Man: “But I don’t know your name.”
Woman: “That’s in the phone book too.”
Man: “So what do you do for a living?”
Woman: “I’m a female impersonator.”
Man: “Hey, baby, what’s your sign?”
Woman: “Do not Enter”
Man: “How do you like your eggs in the morning?”
Woman: “Unfertilized !”
Man: “Hey, come on, we’re both here at this bar for the same reason”
Woman: “Yeah! Let’s pick up some chicks!”
Man: “I know how to please a woman.”
Woman: “Then please leave me alone.”
Man: “I want to give myself to you.”
Woman: “Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.”
Man: “If I could see you naked, I’d die happy:
Woman: “Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing”.
Man: “Your body is like a temple.”
Woman: “Sorry, there are no services today.”
Man: “I’d go through anything for you.”
Woman: “Good! Let’s start with your bank account. Then the door.”
Man: “I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: “Yes, but would you stay there?
It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m checking you out.
Oh, sorry, I’m reserved for someone else.
This may be the all time most memorable response to a pick up line. From Erin Brockovich, starring Julia Roberts. Remember this scene?
George: Can I get your number?
Erin Brockovich: My number? Which one do you want?
George: How many numbers you got?
Erin Brockovich: Oh, I got numbers comin’ outta my ears. For instance: ten.
George: Ten?
Erin Brockovich: Yeah. That’s how many months old my baby girl is.
George: You got a little girl?
Erin Brockovich: Yeah. Yeah, sexy, huh? How ’bout this for a number? Six. That’s how old my other daughter is, eight is the age of my son, two is how many times I’ve been married - and divorced; sixteen is the number of dollars I have in my bank account. 850-3943. That’s my phone number, and with all the numbers I gave you, I’m guessing zero is the number of times you’re gonna call it!
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18 Responses to “Funny Pickup Lines Comebacks””
COMMENT (Not all comments are approved, including rude comments and those with strong language).
Section: Best Funny Jokes, Online Dating Jokes, Stupid, Funny Quotes, Questions & Sayings, pickup lines
February 12th, 2008 at 7:55 am
you stink
February 21st, 2008 at 6:23 pm
I agree. U guys need better jokes
March 6th, 2008 at 3:54 am
i like the one with the phonebook
March 6th, 2008 at 4:08 am
there ok, they cood b a lot betta though but u need more … that r bout different stuff 2…
March 8th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
here’s one:
man: if i could rearrange that alphabet, i’d put U and I togethor.
woman: really? because i’d put F and U
March 10th, 2008 at 9:13 am
all of these rock i love them good on ya
March 10th, 2008 at 5:52 pm
ive seen betta, these r crap,
p.s- hicktown iowa rox!!
March 11th, 2008 at 5:41 am
These are alright i guess I’ve seen funnier.
March 17th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
Boy:hey baby how bout a number or two and i call you
Girl:ok here is my number…… 2
Boy: no i ment ur phone number
Girl: ummm ya i dont think so
March 26th, 2008 at 10:05 pm
cute
April 4th, 2008 at 9:50 am
love it.
April 9th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
boy-”why don’t you sit down on my lap and we can talk about the first thing that pops up!”
girl-well that should be a SHORT conversation…
April 27th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
boy: i think i’ve died and gone to heaven cause i’m lookin’ at an angel!
girl: really? i wished i could have died and gone to hell the moment you walked in!
girl: hey cutie, want to hang out?
boy: i.. uh… i’m gay *COUGHCOUGH*
May 2nd, 2008 at 1:04 am
LOL
Guy: guess what I…..
Girl: *cuts him off* Sorry you must have me confused with somebody who cares
May 22nd, 2008 at 7:30 pm
man, did you guyz fart cuz ur blowin me away! lol
May 23rd, 2008 at 4:25 pm
this is the funniest website ever
June 5th, 2008 at 11:35 am
funny
June 16th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
kinda lame there could have been better but theyre ok